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Much Ado About Nothing
Szerkesztette: Samuel Johnson
173. ACT I. SCENE I.
A Court before Leonato's House.
Enter Leonato, HERO and Beatrice, with a Messenger.
LEONATO
I learn in this letter, that Don Pedro of Arragon
comes this night to Messina.
MESSENGER
He is very near by this; he was not three
leagues off when I left him.
LEONATO
How many gentlemen have you lost in this
action?
MESSENGER
But few of any Sort, and none of Name.
LEONATO
A victory is twice itself, when the atchiever
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brings home full numbers; I find here, that Don Pedro hath bestowed much honour on a young Florentine, call'd Claudio.
MESSENGER
Much deserved on his part, and equally remembred by Don Pedro: he hath borne himself beyond the promise of his age, doing in the figure of a
lamb the feats of a lion: he hath, indeed, better better'd expectation, than you must expect of me to tell
you how.
LEONATO
He hath an uncle here in Messina will be very
much glad of it.
MESSENGER
I have already delivered him letters, and there
appears much joy in him; even so much, that joy
�could not shew itself modest enough, without a badge
of bitterness.
LEONATO
Did he break out into tears?
MESSENGER
In great measure.
LEONATO
A kind overflow of kindness. There are no
faces truer than those that are so wash'd. How much
better is it to weep at joy, than to joy at weeping!
BEATRICE I pray you, is Signior Montanto return'd
from the wars or no?
MESSENGER
I know none of that name, Lady; there was
none such in the army of any Sort.
LEONATO
What is he that you ask for, Need!
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HERO
My Cousin means Signior Benedick of Padua.
MESSENGER
O, he's return'd, and as pleasant as ever he
was.
BEATRICE
He set up his bills here in Messina and challeng'd Cupid at the flight; and my Uncle's fool, reading the challenge, subscrib'd for Cupid, and challeng'd
him at the bird-bolt. I pray you, how many hath he
kill'd and eaten in these wars? but how many hath he
kill'd? for, indeed, I promis'd to eat all of his killing.
LEONATO
Faith, Neice, you tax Signior Benedick too
much; but he'll be meet with you, I doubt it not.
MESSENGER
He hath done good service. Lady, in these
wars.
�BEATRICE
You had musty victuals, and he hath holp to
eat it; he's a very valiant trencher-man, he hath an
excellent stomach.
MESSENGER
And a good soldier too, Lady.
BEATRICE
And a good soldier to a lady? but what is
he to a lord?
MESSENGER
A lord to a lord, a man to a man, stufft with
all honourable virtues.
BEATRICE
It is so, indeed: he is no less than a stufft
man: but for the stuffing, — well, we are all mortal.
LEONATO
You must not. Sir, mistake my Niece; there
is a kind of merry war betwixt Signior Benedick and
her; they never meet, but there's a skirmish of Wit
between them.
BEATRICE
Alas, he gets nothing by That. In our last
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conflict, four of his five wits went halting off, and
now is the whole man govern'd with one: So that if
he have wit enough to keep himself warm, let
him bear it for a difference between himself and his
horse; for it is all the wealth that he hath left, to be
known a reasonable creature. Who is his companion
now? he hath every month a new sworn brother.
MESSENGER
Is it possible?
BEATRICE
Very easily possible; 9 he wears his faith but
as the fashion of his hat, it ever changes with the next
block.
MESSENGER
�I see, Lady, the gentleman is not in your
books.
BEATRICE
No; an he were, I would burn my Study.
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But, I pray you, who is his companion? is there no
young squarer now, that will make a voyage with
him to the devil?
MESSENGER
He is most in the company of the right noble Claudio.
BEATRICE
O lord, he will hang upon him like a disease;
he is sooner caught than the pestilence, and the taker
runs presently mad. God help the noble Claudio, if
he have caught the Benedick; it will cost him a thousand pounds ere he be cur'd.
MESSENGER
I will hold friends with you, Lady.
BEATRICE
Do, good friend.
LEONATO
You'll ne'er run mad, Neice.
BEATRICE
No, not 'till a hot January.
MESSENGER
Don Pedro is approach'd.
SCENE II
Enter Don Pedro Claudio, Benedick, Balthazar, and
Don John.
PEDRO
Good Signior Leonato, you are come to meet
your trouble: the fashion of the world is to avoid
cost, and you encounter it.
LEONATO
�Never came trouble to my house in the likeness of your Grace; for trouble being gone, comfort
should remain; but when you depart from me, forrow abides, and happiness takes his leave.
PEDRO
You embrace your charge too willingly: I
think this is your daughter.
LEONATO
Her mother hath many times told me so.
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BENEDICK
Were you in doubt, Sir, that you askt her?
LEONATO
Signior Benedick, no; for then were you a
child —
PEDRO
You have it full, Benedick; we may guess
by this what you are, being a man: truly the lady
fathers herself; be happy, lady, for you are like an
honourable father.
BENEDICK
If Signior Leonato be her father, the would
not have his head on her shoulders for all Messina, as
like him as the is.
BEATRICE
I wonder, that you will still be talking, Signior Benedick; no body marks you.
BENEDICK
What, my dear lady Disdain! are you yet
living?
BEATRICE
Is it possible, Disdain should die, while the
hath such meet food to feed it, as Signior Benedick?
Courtesie itself must convert to Disdain, if you come
in her presence.
BENEDICK
Then is courtesie a turncoat; but it is certain, I am lov'd of all ladies, only you excepted; and
�I would I could find in my heart that I had not a hard
heart, for truly I love none.
BEATRICE
A dear happiness to women; they would else
have been troubled with a pernicious suitor. I thank
God and my cold blood, I am of your humour for
that; I had rather hear my dog bark at a crow, than
a man swear he loves me.
BENEDICK
God keep your ladyship still in that mind!
so some gentleman or other shall scape a predestinate
scratcht face.
BEATRICE
Scratching could not make it worse, an 'twere
such a face as yours were.
BENEDICK
Well, you are a rare parrot-teacher.
BEATRICE
A bird of my tongue is better than a beast
of yours.
BENEDICK
I would, my horse had the speed of your
tongue, and so good a continuer; but keep your way
o'God's name, I have done.
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BEATRICE
You always end with a jade's trick; I know
you of old.
PEDRO
This is the sum of all: Leonato,—Signior
Claudio, and Signior Benedick,—my dear friend Leonato hath invited you all; I tell him, we shall stay
here at the least a month; and he heartily prays, some
occasion may detain us longer: I dare swear, he is
no hypocrite, but prays from his heart.
LEONATO
If you swear, my Lord, you shall not be
forsworn.— Let me bid you welcome, my lord, being reconciled to the prince your brother; I owe
�you all duty.
JOHN
I thank you; I am not of many words, but
I thank you.
LEONATO
Please it your Grace lead on?
PEDRO
Your hand, Leonato; we will go together.
[Exeunt all but Benedick and Claudio.
SCENE III.
CLAUDIO
Benedick, didst thou note the daughter of
Signior Leonato?
BENEDICK
I noted her not, but I look'd on her.
CLAUDIO
Is the not a modest young lady?
BENEDICK
Do you question me, as an honest man should
do, for my simple true judgment? or would you
have me speak after my custom, as being a professed
tyrant to their sex?
CLAUDIO
No, I pr'ythee, speak in sober judgment.
BENEDICK
Why, i'faith, methinks, she is too low for
an high praise, too brown for a fair praise; and too
little for a great praise; only this commendation I
can afford her, that were the other than she is, she
were unhandsome; and being no other but as she is,
I do not like her.
CLAUDIO
Thou think'st, I am in sport; I pray thee
tell me truly how thou lik'st her.
N 2
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�BENEDICK
Would you buy her, that you enquire after
her?
CLAUDIO
Can the world buy such a jewel?
BENEDICK
Yea, and a case to put it into. But speak you
this with a sad brow? or do you play the flouting
Jack, to tell us Cupid is a good hare-finder, and Vulcan a rare carpenter? come, in what key shall a man
take you to go in the Song?
CLAUDIO
In mine eye, she is the sweetest lady that I
ever look'd on.
BENEDICK
I can see yet without spectacles, and I see no
such matter; there's her Cousin, if she were not possest with such a fury, exceeds her as much in beauty,
as the first of May doth the last of December: but I
hope, you have no intent to turn husband, have you?
CLAUDIO
I would scarce trust myself, tho' I had sworn
the contrary, if Hero would be my wife.
BENEDICK
Is't come to this, in faith? hath not the world
one man, but he will wear his cap with suspicion;
shall I never see a batchelor of threescore again? go
to, i'faith, if thou wilt needs thrust thy neck into a
yoke, wear the print of it, and sigh away Sundays:
look, Don Pedro is return'd to seek you.
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SCENE IV.
Re-enter Don Pedro and Don John.
PEDRO
What secret hath held you here, that you
follow'd not to Leonato's house?
BENEDICK
I would, your Grace would constrain me to tell.
�PEDRO
I charge thee oh thy allegiance.
BENEDICK
You hear, Count Claudio, I can be secret as
a dumb man, I would have you think so; but on my
alliegiance, — mark you this, — on my allegiance. — He
is in love. With whom? — now that is your Grace's
part.— Mark how short his answer is — with Hero
Leonato's short daughter.
CLAUDIO
If this were so, so were it uttered.
BENEDICK
Like the old tale, my lord, it is not so, nor
'twas not so; but, indeed, God forbid it should be so.
CLAUDIO
If my passion change not shortly, God forbid it should be otherwise.
PEDRO
Amen, if you love her, for the Lady is
very well worthy.
CLAUDIO
You speak this to fetch me in, my Lord.
PEDRO
By my troth, I speak my thought.
CLAUDIO
And, in faith, my Lord, I spoke mine.
BENEDICK
And by my two faiths and troths, my Lord
I speak mine.
CLAUDIO
That I love her, I feel.
PEDRO
That she is worthy, I know.
BENEDICK
That I neither feel how she should be loved,
nor know how she should be worthy, is the opinion
that fire cannot melt out of me; I will die in it at the
�stake.
N3
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PEDRO
Thou wast ever an obstinate heretick in the
despight of beauty.
CLAUDIO
And never could maintain his part, but
in the force of his will.
BENEDICK
That a woman conceived me, I thank her;
that she brought me up, I likewise give her most
humble thanks; but that I will have a rechate winded
in my forehead, or hang my bugle in an invisible
baldrick, all women shall pardon me; because I will
not do them the Wrong to mistrust any, I will do my
self the Right to trust none; and the fine is, (for the
which I may go the finer,) I will live a batchelor.
PEDRO
I shall see thee, ere I die, look pale with
love.
BENEDICK
With anger, with sickness, or with hunger,
my lord, not with love: prove, that ever I lose more
blood with love, than I will get again with drinking,
pick out mine eyes with a balladmaker's pen, and
hang me up at the door of a brothel-house for the
Sign of blind Cupid.
PEDRO
Well, if ever thou dost fall from this faith,
thou wilt prove a notable argument.
BENEDICK
If I do, hang me in a bottle like a cat, and
shoot at me; and he that hits me, let him be clapt on
the shoulder, and call'd Adam.
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PEDRO
Well, as time shall try; in time the savage
�bull doth bear the yoke.
BENEDICK
The savage bull may, but if ever the sensible
Benedick bear it, pluck off the bull's-horns, and set
them in my forehead, and let me be vilely painted;
and in such great letters as they write, Here is good
Horse to hire, let them signifie under my Sign, Here
you may see Benedick the marry'd man.
CLAUDIO
If this should ever happen, thou would'st
be horn-mad.
PEDRO
Nay, if Cupid hath not spent all his quiver in Venice, thou wilt quake for this shortly.
BENEDICK
I look for an earthquake too then.
PEDRO
Well, you will temporize with the hours;
in the mean time, good Signior Benedick; repair to
Leonato's, commend me to him, and tell him I will
not fail him at supper; for, indeed, he hath made
great preparation.
BENEDICK
I have almost matter enough in me for such
an embassage, and so I commit you ——
CLAUDIO
To the tuition of God; From my house, if
I had it, ——
PEDRO
The sixth of July, your loving friend, Benedick.
BENEDICK
Nay, mock not, mock not; the body of your
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discourse is sometime guarded with fragments, and the
guards arc but slightly basted on neither: ere * you
flout old ends any further, examine your conscience,
and so I leave you. [Exit.
�SCENE V.
CLAUDIO
My Liege, your Highness now may do me
good.
PEDRO
My love is thine to teach, teach it but how,
And thou shalt see how apt it is to learn
Any hard lesson that may do thee good.
CLAUDIO Hath Leonato any son, my lord?
PEDRO No child but HERO she's his only heir;
Dost thou affect her, Claudio?
CLAUDIO
O my lord,
When you went onward on this ended action,
I look'd upon her with a soldier's eye;
That lik'd, but had a rougher task in hand
Than to drive liking to the name of love;
But now I am return'd, and that war-thoughts
Have left their places vacant; in their rooms
Come thronging soft and delicate Desires,
All prompting me how fair young Hero is;
Saying, 1 lik'd her ere I went to wars.
PEDRO Thou wilt be like a lover presently.
And tire the hearer with a book of words.
If thou dost love fair HERO cherish it,
And I will break with her, and with her Father;
And Thou shalt have her. Was't not to this end.
That thou began'st to twist so fine a story?
CLAUDIO
How sweetly do you minister to love,
That know love's grief by his complection!
But left my liking might too sudden seem,
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I would have salv'd it with a longer treatise.
PEDRO
What need the bridge much broader than
the flood?
Re-enter Leonato and Antonio,
�LEONATO
How now, Brother, where is my Cousin
your son? hath he provided this musick?
ANTONIO
He is very busy about it; but, brother, I can
tell you news that you yet dream'd not of.
LEONATO
Are they good?
ANTONIO
As the event stamps them, but they have a
good cover; they show well outward. The Prince
and Count Claudio, walking in a thick-pleached alley
in my orchard, were thus over-heard by a man of
mine: The Prince discover'd to Claudio, that he lov'd
my neice your daughter, and meant to acknowledge
it this night in a dance; and if he found her accordant, he meant to take the present time by the top, and
instantly break with you of it.
LEONATO
Hath the fellow any wit, that told you this?
ANTONIO A good sharp fellow; I will send for him,
and question him yourself.
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LEONATO
No, no; we will hold it as a dreams 'till it
appear itself. But I will acquaint my daughter withal,
that she may be the better prepared for answer, if peradventure this be true; go you and tell her of it.
[Several cross the Stage here.] Cousin, you know what
you have to do. — O, I cry you mercy, friend, go you
with me and I will use your skill. Good cousin, have
a care this busy time. [Exeunt.
SCENE VI.
Changes to an Apartment in Leonato's House,
Enter Don John and Conrade.
CONRADE
What the good-jer, my lord, why are
you thus out of measure sad?
�JOHN
There is no measure in the occasion that
breeds it, therefore the sadness is without limit.
CONRADE
You should hear reason.
JOHN
And when I have heard it, what Blessing
bringeth it?
CONRADE
If not a present remedy, yet a patient sufferance.
JOHN
I wonder, that, thou (being, as thou say'st
thou art, born under Saturn) goest about to apply a
moral medicine to a mortifying mischief: I cannot hide
what I am: I must be sad when I have cause, and
smile at no man's jets; eat when I have stomach,
and wait for no man's leisure; sleep when I am drowsy,
and tend on no man's business; laugh when I am merry,
and claw no man in his humour.
187
CONRADE
Yea, but you must not make the full show
of this, 'till you may do it without controlement; you
have of late stood out against your brother, and he
hath ta'en you newly into his grace, where it is impossible you should take root, but by the fair weather
that you make yourself; it is needful that you frame
the season for your own harvest.
JOHN
I had rather be a canker in a hedge, than
a rose in his grace; and it better fits my blood to be
disdain'd of all, than to fashion a carriage to rob love
from any: in this (though I cannot be said to be a
flattering honest man) it must not be deny'd but I am
a plain-dealing villain; I am trusted with a muzzel,
and infranchised with a clog, therefore I have decreed
not to sing in my cage: if I had my mouth, I would
bite; if I had my liberty, I would do my liking: in
the mean time let me be that I am, and seek not to
alter me.
�CONRADE
Can you make no use of your discontent?
JOHN
I will make all use of it, for I use it only.
Who comes here? what news, Borachio?
Enter Borachio.
BORACHIO
I came yonder from a great supper; the
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Prince, your brother, is royally entertain'd by Leonato,
and I can give you intelligence of an intended marriage.
JOHN
Will it serve for any model to build mischief
on? what is he for a fool, that betroths himself to
unquietness?
BORACHIO
Marry, it is your brother's right hand.
JOHN
Who, the most exquisite Claudio?
BORACHIO
Even he.
JOHN
A proper Squire! and who, and who?
which way looks he?
BORACHIO
Marry, on Hero the daughter and heir of
Leonato.
JOHN
A very forward March chick! How come
you to know this?
BORACHIO
Being entertain'd for a perfumer, as I was
smoaking a musty room, comes me the Prince and
Claudio hand in hand in sad conference. I whipt behind the Arras, and there heard it agreed upon, that
�the Prince should woo Hero for himself; and having
obtained her, give her to Count Clmdio,
JOHN Come, come, let us thither, this may prove
food to my displeasure. That young start-up hath all
the glory of my overthrow; if I can cross him any
way, I bless myself every way; you are both sure,
and will assist me.
CONRADE
To the death, my lord.
JOHN
Let us to the great supper; their Cheer is
the greater, that I am subdu'd 'would the cook were
of my mind! ———Shall we go prove what's to be
done?
BORACHIO
We'll wait upon your lordship. [Exeunt.
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ACT II. SCENE I.
A Hall in Leonato's House.
Enter Leonato, Antonio, Hero, Beatrice, Margaret,
and Ursula.
LEONATO
Was not Count John here at Supper?
ANTONIO
I saw him not.
BEATRICE
How tartly that gentleman looks! I never
can see him, but I am heart-burn'd an hour after.
HERO
He is of a very melancholy disposition.
BEATRICE
He were an excellent man, that were made
just in the mid-way between him and Benedick; the
one is too like an image, and says nothing: and the
other too like my lady's eldest son, evermore tatling.
LEONATO
�Then half Signior Benedick's tongue in Count
John's mouth, and half Count John's melancholy in
Signior Benedick's face ——
BEATRICE
With a good Leg, and a good foot, Uncle,
and mony enough in his purse, such a man would
win any woman in the world, if he could get her
good will.
LEONATO
By my troth. Niece, thou wilt never get
thee a husband, if thou be so shrewd of thy tongue.
ANTONIO
In faith, she's too curst.
BEATRICE
Too curst is more than curst; I shall lessen
God's sending that way; for it is said, God sends a
curst Cow short horns; but to a Cow too curst he
sends none.
190
LEONATO
So, by being too curst, God will send you
no horns.
BEATRICE
Just, if he send me no Husband; for the
which Blessing I am at him upon my knees every
morning and evening: Lord! I could not endure a
husband with a beard on his face, I had rather lye in
woollen.
LEONATO
You may light upon a husband, that hath
no beard.
BEATRICE
What should I do with him? dress him in my
apparel, and make him my waiting-gentlewoman?
he that hath a beard is more than a youth, and he
that hath no beard is less than a man and he that is
more than a youth, is not for me; and he that is less
than a man, I am not for him: therefore I will even
take six pence in earnest of the bear-herd, and lead
his apes into hell.
�ANTONIO
Well, Niece, I trust, you will be rul'd by
your father. [To Hero.
BEATRICE
Yes, faith, it is my Cousin's duty to make
curtsie, and say, Father, as it pleases you; but yet for
all that, Cousin, let him be a handsome fellow, or else
make another curtsie, and say, Father, as it pleases me.
LEONATO
Well, Niece, I hope to see you one day fitted
with a husband.
BEATRICE
Not 'till God make men of some other metal than earth; would it not grieve a woman to be
over-master'd with a piece of valiant dust? to make
account of her life to a clod of way-ward marle? no,
uncle. I'll none; Adam's sons are my brethren, and,
truly, I hold it a sin to match in my kindred.
LEONATO Daughter, remember, what I told you; if
191
the Prince do sollicit you in that kind, you know your
answer.
BEATRICE
The fault will be in the musick, cousin, if
you be not woo'd in good time; If the Prince be too
important, tell him, there is measure in every thing,
and so dance out. the Answer; for hear me, Hero
wooing, wedding, and repenting, is as a Scotch jig, a
measure, and a cinque-pace; the first suit is hot and
hasty, like a Scotch jig; and full as fantastical; the
wedding mannerly-modest, as a measure, full of state
and ancientry; and then comes repentance, and with
his bad legs falls into the cinque-pace faster and faster,
'till he sinks into his grave.
LEONATO
Cousin, you apprehend passing shrewdly.
BEATRICE
I have a good eye, uncle, I can see a church
by day-light.
�LEONATO
The revellers are entring, brother; make
good room.
SCENE II.
Enter Don Pedro, Claudio, Benedick, Balthazar, and
others, in Masquerade.
PEDRO
Lady, will you walk about with your friend?
HERO
So you walk softly, and look sweetly, and
say nothing, I am yours for the walk, and especially
when I walk away.
PEDRO
With me in your company?
HERO
I may say so, when I please.
PEDRO
And when please you to say so?
HERO
When I like your favour; for God desend,
the lute should be like the case!
PEDRO
My visor is Philemon's roof; within the
house is Jove.
192
HERO
Why, then your visor should be thatch'd.
PEDRO
Speak low, if you speak love.
BALTHASAR
Well; I would, you did like me.
MARGARET
So would not I for your own sake, for I have
many ill qualities.
�BALTHASAR
Which is one?
MARGARET
I say my Prayers aloud.
BALTHASAR
I love you the better, the hearers may cry
Amen.
MARGARET
God match me with a good dancer!
BALTHASAR
Amen.
MARGARET
And God keep him out of my fight when
the dance is done! Answer, Clerk.
BALTHASAR
No more words, the clerk is answer'd.
193
URSULA
I know you well enough; you are Signior
Antonio.
ANTONIO
At a word, I am not.
URSULA
I know you by the wagling of your head.
ANTONIO
To tell you true, I counterfeit him.
URSULA
You could never do him so ill-well, unless
you were the very man: here's his dry hand up and
down; you are he, you are he.
ANTONIO
At a word, I am not.
URSULA
Come, come, do you think, I do not know
you by your excellent wit? can virtue hide itself? go
�to, mum, you are he; graces will appear, and there's
an end.
BEATRICE
Will you not tell me, who told you so?
BENEDICK
No you shall pardon me.
BEATRICE
Nor will you not tell me, who you are?
BENEDICK
Not now.
BEATRICE
That I was disdainful, and that I had my
good Wit out of the Hundred merry Tales; well,
this was Signior Benedick that said so.
BENEDICK
What's he?
BEATRICE
I am sure, you know him well enough.
BENEDICK
Not I, believe me.
BEATRICE
Did he never make you laugh?
BENEDICK
I pray you, what is he?
BEATRICE
Why, he is the Prince's jester; a very dull
fool, only his gift is in devising impossible slanders:
none but libertines delight in him, and the commendation is not in his wit, but in his villany; for he
both pleaseth men and angers them, and then they
194
laugh at him, and beat him; I am sure, he is in the
fleet; I would, he had boarded me.
BENEDICK
When 1 know the gentleman, I'll tell him
�what you say.
BEATRICE
Do, do, he'll but break a comparison or two
on me; which, peradventure, not mark'd, or not
laugh'd at, strikes him into melancholy, and then
there's a partridge wing sav'd, for the fool will eat no
supper that night. We must follow the leaders.
[Musick within.
BENEDICK
In every good thing.
BEATRICE
Nay, if they lead to any ill, I will leave them
at the next turning. [Exeunt.
SCENE III.
Manent John, Borachio, and Claudio.
JOHN
Sure, my brother is amorous on Hero and
hath withdrawn her father to break with him about it:
the ladies follow her, and but one visor remains.
BORACHIO
And that is Claudio; I know him by his Bearing.
JOHN
Are you Signior Benedick?
CLAUDIO
You know me well, I am he.
JOHN
Signior, you are very near my brother in hislove, he is enamour'd on Hero ; I pray you dissuade
him from her, she is no equal for his birth; you may
do the part of an honest man in it.
CLAUDIO
How know ye, he loves her?
JOHN
I heard him sweat his affection.
�BORACHIO
So did I too, and he swore he would marry
her to night.
JOHN
Come, let us to the banquet.
[Exeunt John and Borachio.
CLAUDIO
Thus answer I in name of Benedick,
But hear this ill news with the ears of CLAUDIO
'Tis certain so—the Prince wooes for himself.
195
Friendship is constant in all other things,
Save in the office and affairs of love;
Therefore all hearts in love use their own tongue's.
Let every eye negotiate for itself,
And trust no agent; beauty is a witch,
Against whose charms faith melteth into blood.
This is an accident of hourly proof,
Which I mistrusted not. Farewel then, Hero!
Enter Benedick.
BENEDICK
Count Claudio?
CLAUDIO
Yea, the same.
BENEDICK
Come, will you go with me?
CLAUDIO
Whither?
BENEDICK
Even to the next willow, about your own
business, Count. What fashion will you wear the
garland of? about your neck, like an Usurer's chain 6?
or under your arm, like a Lieutenant's scarf? you
must wear it one way, for the Prince hath got your
Hero.
CLAUDIO
I wish him Joy of her.
�BENEDICK
Why, that's spoken like an honest drover;
so they fell bullocks: but did you think, the Prince
would have served you thus?
CLAUDIO
I pray you, leave me.
BENEDICK
Ho! now you strike like the blind man;
'twas the boy that stole your meat, and you'll beat the
Post.
CLAUDIO
If it will not be, I'll leave you. [Exit.
BENEDICK
Alas, poor hurt fowl! now will he creep into sedges. — But, that my Lady Beatrice should know
me, and not know me! the Prince's fool! — ha? it
may be, I go under that Title, because I am merry—
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196
yea, but so I am apt to do myself wrong: I am not
so reputed. It is the base (tho' bitter) disposition
of Beatrice, that puts the world into her person, and
so gives me out; well, I'll be reveng'd as I may.
SCENE IV.
Enter Don Pedro.
PEDRO
Now, Signior, where's the Count? Did you
see him
BENEDICK
Troth, my lord, I have play'd the part of
lady Fame. I found him here as melancholy as a
lodge in a warren, I told him (and I think, told him
true) that your Grace had got the Will of this young
lady, and I offer'd him my company to a willow tree,
either to make him a garland, as being forsaken, or
to bind him up a rod, as being worthy to be whipt.
�PEDRO
To be whipt! what's his fault?
BENEDICK
The flat transgression of a School-boy; who,
being overjoy'd with finding a bird's nest, shews it his
companion, and he steals it.
PEDRO
Wilt thou make a trust, a transgression? the
transgression is in the stealer.
BENEDICK
Yet it had not been amiss, the rod had been
made, and the garland too; for the garland he might
have worn himself, and the rod he might have bestow'd on you, who (as I take it) have stol'n his bird's
nest.
PEDRO
I will but teach them to sing, and restore
them to the owner.
197
BENEDICK
If their singing answer your saying, by my
faith, you say honestly.
PEDRO
The lady Beatrice hath a quarrel to you; the
gentleman, that danc'd with her, told her she is much
wrong'd by you.
BENEDICK
O, she misus'd me past the indurance of a
block; an oak, but with one green leaf on it, would
have answer'd her; my very visor began to assume life,
and scold with her; she told me, not thinking I had
been myself, that I was the Prince's jester, and that I
was duller than a great thaw; hudling jest upon jest,
with such impassable conveyance upon me, that l stood
like a man at a mark, with a whole army shooting at
me; she speaks Ponyards, and every word stabs: if
her breath were as terrible as her terminations, there
were no living near her, she would infect to the
North-star; I would not marry her, though she were
endowed with all that Adam had left him before he
transgress'd ; she would have made Hercules have turn'd
�Spit, yea and have cleft his club to make the fire too.
Come, talk not of her, you shall find her the infernal
Ate in good apparel. I would to God, some scholar
198
would conjure her; for, certainly, while she is here, a
man may live as quiet in hell as in a sanctuary, and
people sin upon purpose, because they would go thither; so, indeed, all disquiet, horror, and perturbation follow her.
SCENE V.
Enter Claudio, Beatrice, Leonato and Hero.
PEDRO
Look, here she comes.
BENEDICK
Will your Grace command me any service to
the world's end? I will go on the slightest errand now
to the Antipodes, that you can devise to send me on;
I will fetch you a tooth-picker now from the farthest
inch of Asia; bring you the length of Prester John's
foot: fetch you a hair off the great Cham's beard: do
you any ambassage to the pigmies, rather than hold
three words conference with this harpy; you have no
employment for me?
PEDRO
None, but to desire your good company.
BENEDICK
O God, Sir, here's a dish I love not. I cannot indure this Lady Tongue.
PEDRO
Come, Lady, come; you have lost the heart
of Signior Benedick.
BEATRICE
Indeed, my Lord, he lent it me a while, and
I gave him use for it, a double heart for a single one;
marry, once before he won it of me with false dice,
therefore your Grace may well say, I have lost it.
PEDRO
You have put him down, Lady, you have
�put him down.
BEATRICE
So I would not he should do me, my Lord,
left I should prove the mother of fools; I have brought
Count Claudio, whom you sent me to seek.
PEDRO
Why, how now, Count, wherefore are you
sad?
CLAUDIO
Not sad, my Lord.
PEDRO
How then? sick?
199
CLAUDIO
Neither, my Lord.
BEATRICE
The Count is neither sad, nor sick, nor merry,
nor well; but civil, Count, civil as an orange, and
something of that jealous complexion.
PEDRO
I'faith, Lady, I think your blazon to be true;
though I'll be sworn, if he be so, his conceit is false.
Here, Claudio, I have wooed in thy name, and fair
Hero is won; I have broke with her father, and his
good will obtained; name the day of marriage, and
God give thee joy.
LEONATO
Count, take of me my daughter, and with
her my fortunes: his Grace hath made the match, and
all grace say, Amen, to it.
BEATRICE
Speak, Count, 'tis your cue. ——
CLAUDIO
Silence is the perfectest herald of joy; I were
but little happy, if I could say how much. Lady, as
you are mine, I am yours: I give away myself for
you, and doat upon the exchange.
�BEATRICE
Speak, Cousin, or (if you cannot) stop his
mouth with a kiss, and let him not speak neither.
PEDRO
In faith, Lady, you have a merry heart.
BEATRICE
Yea, my Lord, I thank it, poor fool, it keeps
on the windy side of care; my cousin tells him in his
ear, that he is in her heart.
CLAUDIO
And so she doth, cousin.
BEATRICE
Good Lord, for alliance! — thus goes every
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200
one to the world but I, and I am fun-burn'd; I may
sit in a corner, and cry heigh ho! for a husband.
PEDRO
Lady Beatrice, I will get you one.
BEATRICE
I would rather have one of your Father's getting: hath your Grace ne'er a brother like you? your
Father got excellent Husbands, if a maid could come
by them.
PEDRO
Will you have me, Lady?
BEATRICE
No, my Lord, unless I might have another
for working days; your Grace is too costly to wear
every day: but, I beseech your Grace, pardon me, I
was bound to speak all mirth and no matter.
PEDRO
Your silence most offends me, and to be
merry best becomes you; for, out of question, you
were born in a merry hour.
BEATRICE
�No, sure, my Lord, my mother cry'd; but
then there was a star danc'd, and under that I was born.
— Cousins, God give you joy.
LEONATO
Niece, will you look to those things I told
you of?
BEATRICE
I cry you mercy, Uncle: by your Grace's
pardon. [Exit Beatrice.
SCENE VI.
PEDRO
By my troth, a pleasant-spirited Lady.
LEONATO
There's little of the melancholy element in
her, my Lord; she is never sad but when she sleeps,
and not ever sad then; for I have heard my daughter
say, she hath often dream'd of an unhappiness, and
wak'd herself with laughing.
PEDRO
She cannot endure to hear tell of a husband.
201
LEONATO
O, by no means, she mocks all her wooers
out of suit.
PEDRO
She were an excellent wife for Benedick.
LEONATO
O Lord, my Lord, if they were but a week
marry'd, they would talk themselves mad.
PEDRO
Count Claudio, when mean you to go to
church?
CLAUDIO
To-morrow, my Lord; time goes on
crutches, 'till love have all its rites.
LEONATO
�Not 'till Monday, my dear son, which is hence
a just seven-night, and a time too brief too, to have
all things answer my mind.
PEDRO
Come,you shake the head at so long a breathing; but, I warrant thee, Claudio, the time shall not
go dully by us. I will in the Interim undertake one of
Hercules's labours, which is, to bring Signior Benedick
and the Lady Beatrice into a mountain of affection the
one with the other; I would fain have it a match, and
I doubt not to fashion it, if you three will but minister
such assistance as I shall give you direction.
LEONATO
My Lord, I am for you, though it cost me
ten nights watchings.
CLAUDIO
And I, my Lord.
PEDRO
And you too, gentle Hero?
HERO
I will do any modest office, my Lord, to help
my cousin to a good husband.
PEDRO
And Benedick is not the unhopefullest husband
that I know: thus far I can praise him, he is of a noble strain, of approv'd valour, and confirm'd honesty.
202
I will teach you how to humour your Cousin, that she
shall fall in love with Benedick; and I, with your two
helps, will so practise on Benedick, that in despight of
his quick wit, and his queasy stomach, he shall fall in
love with Beatrice. If we can do this, Cupid is no
longer an archer, his glory shall be ours for we are the
only Love-Gods: go in with me, and I will tell you
my drift. [Exeunt.
SCENE VII.
Changes to another Apartment in Leonato's House.
Enter Don John and Borachio.
�JOHN
It is so, the Count Claudia shall marry the
Daughter of Leonato.
BORACHIO
Yea, my lord, but I can cross it.
JOHN
Any bar, any cross, any impediment will be
medicinable to me. I am sick in displeasure to him;
and whatsoever comes athwart his affection, ranges
evenly with mine. How canst thou cross this marriage?
BORACHIO
Not honestly, my Lord, but so covertly that
no dishonesty shall appear in me.
JOHN
Shew me briefly how.
BORACHIO
I think, I told your lordship a year since, how
much I am in the favour of Margaret, the waitinggentlewoman to Hero.
JOHN
I remember.
BORACHIO
I can, at any unseasonable instant of the night,
appoint her to look out at her lady's chamber window.
JOHN
What life is in That, to be the death of this
marriage?
BORACHIO
The poison of That lies in you to temper;
go you to the Prince your Brother, spare not to tell
him, that he hath wrong'd his honour in marrying the
203
renown'd Claudio (whose estimation do you mightily
hold up) to a contaminated Stale, such a one as Hero.
�JOHN
What proof shall I make of That?
BORACHIO
Proof enough to misuse the Prince, to vex
Claudio, to undo Hero and kill Leonato; look you for
any other issue?
JOHN
Only to despight them, I will endeavour any
thing.
BORACHIO
Go then find me a meet hour, to draw Don
204
Pedro, and the Count Claudio, alone; tell them, that
you know, Hero loves me; intend a kind of zeal both
to the Prince and Claudio, as in a love of your Brother's honour, who hath made this match; and his
friend's reputation, who is thus like to be cozen'd with
the semblance of a maid, that you have discover'd
thus. They will hardly believe this without trial.
Offer them instances, which shall bear no less likelihood than to see me at her chamber-window; hear me
call Margaret, Hero; hear Margaret term me Borachio; and bring them to see this, the very night before
the intended Wedding; for in the mean time I will so
fashion the matter, that Hero shall be absent; and there
shall appear such seeming truth of Hero's disloyalty,
that jealousy shall be call'd assurance, and all the preparation overthrown.
JOHN
Grow this to what adverse issue it can, I will
put it in practice: be cunning in working this, and
thy see is a thousand ducats.
BORACHIO
Be thou constant in the accusation, and my
cunning shall not shame me.
JOHN
I will presently go learn their day of marriage. [Exeunt.
SCENE VIII.
�Changes to Leonato's Orchard.
Enter Benedick, a Boy.
BENEDICK
Boy.
BOY
Signior.
BENEDICK
In my chamber-window lies a book, bring it
hither to me in the orchard.
205
BOY
I am here already, Sir.
BENEDICK
I know that — but I would have thee hence,
and here again. [Exit Boy.] — I do much wonder, that
one man. seeing how much another man is a fool,
when he dedicates his behaviour to love, will, after
he hath laught at such shallow follies in others, become
the argument of his own scorn, by falling in love! and
such a man is Claudio. I have known, when there
was no musick with him but the drum and the fife ;
and now had he rather hear the tabor and the pipe; I
have known, when he would have walk'd ten mile afoot, to see a good armour; and now will he lye ten
nights awake, carving the fashion of a new doublet.
He was wont to speak plain, and to the purpose, like
an honest man and a soldier; and now is he turn'd orthographer, his words are a very fantastical banquet,
just so many strange dishes. May I be so converted,
and see with these eyes? I cannot tell; I think not. I
will not be sworn, but love may transform me to an
oyster; but I'll take my oath on it, 'till he have made
an oyster of me, he shall never make me such a fool:
one woman is fair, yet I am well; another is wife, yet
I am well; another virtuous, yet I am well. But 'till
all graces be in one woman, one woman shall not come
in my grace. Rich he shall be, that's certain; wife,
or I'll none; virtuous, or I'll never cheapen her; fair,
or I'll never look on her; mild, or come not near me;
noble, or not I for an angel; of good discourse, an
excellent musician, and her hair shall be of what colour it please God. Ha! the Prince and Monsieur
�Love! I will hide me in the arbour. [Withdraws.
SCENE IX.
Enter Don Pedro, Leonato, Claudio, and Balthazar.
PEDRO
Come, shall we hear this musick.
CLAUDIO
Yea, my good lord— how still the evening is,
206
As hush'd on purpose to grace harmony!
PEDRO
See you where Benedick hath hid himself?
CLAUDIO
O very well, my lord the musick ended,
We'll fit the kid-fox with a penny-worth.
PEDRO
Come, Balthazar, we'll hear that Song again.
BALTHASAR
O good my lord, tax not so bad a voice
To slander musick any more than once.
PEDRO
It is the witness still of excellency,
To put a strange face on his own perfection;
I pray thee, sing; and let me woo no more.
BALTHASAR
Because you talk of wooing, I will sing;
Since many a wooer doth commence his suit
To her he thinks not worthy, yet he wooes;
Yet will he swear, he loves.
PEDRO
Nay, pray thee, come;
Or if thou wilt hold longer argument.
Do it in notes.
BALTHASAR
Note this before my notes,
There's not a note of mine, that's worth the noting.
�PEDRO
Why, there are very crotchets that he speaks,
Note, notes, forsooth, and noting.
BENEDICK
Now, divine air; now is his foul ravish'd!—
is it not strange, that sheeps guts should hale souls out
of men's bodies? — well, a horn for my mony, when
all's done.
The SONG.
Sigh no more, ladies, sigh no more,
Men were deceivers ever;
One foot in sea; and one on shore,
To one thing constant never:
Then sigh not so, but let them go,
And be you blith and bonny;
Converting all your sounds of woe
Into hey nony, nony.
207
Sing no more ditties, sing no mo
Of dumps so dull and heavy;
The frauds of men were ever so,
Since summer was first leafy:
Then sigh not so, &c.
PEDRO
By my troth, a good Song.
BALTHASAR
And an ill singer, my lord.
PEDRO
Ha, no; no, faith thou sing'st well enough
for a shift.
BENEDICK
[aside.] If he had been a dog, that should
have howl'd thus, they would have hang'd him; and,
I pray God, his bad voice bode no mischief! I had as
lief have heard the night-raven, come what plague
could have come after it.
PEDRO
Yea, marry, dost thou hear, Balthazar? I
pray thee get us some excellent musick; for to mor-
�row night we would have it at the lady Hero's chamber-window.
BALTHASAR
The best I can, my lord. [Exit Balthazar.
PEDRO
Do so: farewel. Come hither, Leonato;
what was it you told me of to day, that your Niece
Beatrice was in love with Signior Benedick?
CLAUDIO
O, ay; —— stalk on, stalk on, the fowl
fits, [aside to Pedro.] I did never think that lady would
have loved any man.
LEONATO
No, nor I neither; but most wonderful, that
she should so doat on Signior Benedick, whom she hath
in all outward behaviours seem'd ever to abhor.
BENEDICK
It's possible, fits the wind in that corner? Aside.
LEONATO
By my troth, my lord, I cannot tell what to
think of it; but that she loves him with an inraged
affection, it is path the infinite of thought.
208
PEDRO
May be, she doth but counterfeit.
CLAUDIO
Faith, like enough.
LEONATO
O God! counterfeit there was never counterfeit of passion came so near the life of passion, as
she discovers it.
PEDRO
Why, what effects of passion shews she?
CLAUDIO
Bait the hook well, this fish will bite. [Aside.
LEONATO
�What effects, my lord? she will fit you, you
heard my daughter tell you how.
CLAUDIO
She did, indeed.
PEDRO
How, how, I pray you? you amaze me: I
would have thought, her spirit had been invincible
against all assaults of affection.
LEONATO
I would have sworn, it had, my lord; especially against Benedick.
BENEDICK
[Aside.] I should think this a gull, but that
the white-bearded fellow speaks it; knavery cannot,
sure, hide himself in such reverence.
CLAUDIO
He hath ta'en th' infection, hold it up. [Aside.
PEDRO
Hath she made her affection known to Benedick?
209
LEONATO
No, and swears she never will; that's her
torment.
CLAUDIO
'Tis true, indeed, so your daughter says:
shall I, says she, that have so oft encounter'd him
with scorn, write to him that I love him?
LEONATO
This says she now, when she is beginning to
write to him; for she'll be up twenty times a night,
and there she will fit in her smock, 'till she have writ
a sheet of paper — my daughter tells us all.
CLAUDIO
Now you talk of a sheet of paper, I remember a pretty jest your daughter told us of.
LEONATO
�Oh, — when she had writ it, and was reading it over, she found Benedick and Beatrice between
the sheet.
CLAUDIO
That —
LEONATO
O, she tore the letter into a thousand halfpence; rail'd at herself, that she should be so immodest,
to write to one that, she knew, would flout her: I
measure him, says she, by my own Spirit, for, I
should flout him if he writ to me; yea, though I
love him, I should.
CLAUDIO
Then down upon her knees she falls, weeps,
sobs, beats her heart, tears her hair, prays, curses;
O sweet Benedick! God give me patience!
LEONATO
She doth, indeed, my daughter says so; and
the ecstacy hath so much overborne her, that my
daughter is sometime afraid, she will do desperate
outrage to herself; it is very true.
210
PEDRO
It were good that Benedick knew of it by
some other, if she will not discover it.
CLAUDIO
To what end? he would but make a sport
of it, and torment the poor lady worse.
PEDRO
If he should, it were an Alms to hang him;
she's an excellent sweet lady, and (out of all suspicion)
she is virtuous.
CLAUDIO
And she is exceeding wise.
PEDRO
In every thing, but in loving Benedick.
LEONATO
O my lord, wisdom and blood combating in
�so tender a body, we have ten proofs to one that blood
hath the victory; I am sorry for her, as I have just
cause, being her uncle and her guardian.
PEDRO
I would, she
I would have
half myself.
what he will
had bestow'd this dotage on me;
daft all other respects, and made her
I pray you tell Benedick of it; and hear
say.
LEONATO
Were it good, think you?
CLAUDIO
Hero thinks, surely she will die; for she says,
she will die if he love her not, and she will die ere she
make her love known; and she will die if he woo her,
rather than she will bate one breath of her accustom'd
crossness.
PEDRO
She doth well; if she should make tender of
her love, 'tis very possible, he'll scorn it; for the man,
as you know all, hath a contemptible spirit.
CLAUDIO
He is a very proper man.
PEDRO
He hath, indeed, a good outward happiness.
CLAUDIO
'Fore God, and, in my mind, very wise.
PEDRO
He doth, indeed, shew some sparks that are
like wit.
LEONATO
And I take him to be valiant.
PEDRO
As Hector, I assure you; and in the managing of quarrels you may say he is wise; for either
211
he avoids them with great discretion, or undertakes
them with a christian-like fear.
�LEONATO
If he do fear God, he must necessarily keep
peace; if he break the peace, he ought to enter into
a quarrel with fear and trembling.
PEDRO
And so will he do, for the man
God, howsoever it seems not in
jests he will make. Well, I am
shall we go seek Benedick, and
doth fear
him, by some large
sorry for your Niece:
tell him of her love?
CLAUDIO
Never tell him, my lord; let her wear it out
with good counsel.
LEONATO
Nay, that's impossible, she may wear her
heart out first.
PEDRO
Well, we will hear further of it by your
daughter; let it cool the while. I love Benedick well;
and I could wish he would modestly examine himself,
to see how much he is unworthy to have so good a
lady.
LEONATO
My Lord, will you walk? dinner is ready.
CLAUDIO
If he do not dote on her upon this, I will
never trust my expectation. [Aside.
PEDRO
Let there be the same net spread for her, and
that must your daughter and her gentlewomen carry.
The sport will be, when they hold an opinion of one
another's dotage, and no such matter; that's the Scene
that I would see, which will be meerly a Dumb Show;
let us send her to call him to dinner. [Aside.] [Exeunt.
SCENE X.
Benedick advances from the Arbour.
BENEDICK
This can be no trick, the conference was sadly borne. — They have the truth of this from Hero;
�they seem to pity the lady it seems, her affections
have the full bent. Love me! why, it must be requited. I hear, how I am censur'd , they aay, I will
P2
212
bear myself proudly, if I perceive the love come from
her; they say too, that she will rather die than give
any sign of affection.—— I did never think to marry
——I must not seem proud — happy are they that
hear their detractions, and can put them to mending.
They say, the lady is fair; 'tis a truth, I can bear
them witness. And virtuous; —— 'tis so, I cannot
reprove it. And wife — but for loving me —— by my
troth, it is no addition to her wit—— nor no great argument of her folly; for I will be horribly in love
with her. —— I may chance to have some odd quirks
and remnants of wit broken on me, because I have
rail'd so long against marriage; but doth not the appetite alter? a man loves the meat in his youth, that
he cannot endure in his age. Shall quips and sentences, and these paper-bullets of the brain, awe a man
from the career of his humour? no: the world must
be peopled. When I said, I would die a batchelor, I
did not think I should live 'till I were marry'd. Here
comes Beatrice: by this day, she's a fair lady; I do
spy some marks of love in her.
Enter Beatrice.
BEATRICE
Against my will, I am sent to bid you come
in to dinner.
BENEDICK
Fair Beatrice, I thank you for your pains.
BEATRICE
I took no more pains for those thanks, than
you take pains to thank me; if it had been painful, I
would not have come.
BENEDICK
You take pleasure then in the message.
BEATRICE
Yea, just so much as you may take upon a
�knife's point, and choak a daw withal— You have no
stomach, Signior; fare you well. [Exit.
BENEDICK
Ha! against my will I am sent to bid you come
in to dinner: —— there's a double meaning in that. I
took no more pains for those thanks, than you take pains
to thank me; —— that's as much as to say, any pains
213
that I take for you is as easy as thanks. If I do not
take pity of her, I am a villain; if I do not love her,
I am a Jew; I will go get her picture. [Exit.
ACT III. SCENE I.
Continues in the Orchard.
Enter Hero, Margaret, and Ursula.
HERO
Good Margaret, run thee into thee parlour.
There shalt thou find my Cousin Beatrice,
Proposing with the Prince and Claudio;
Whisper her ear, and tell her, I and Ursula
Walk in the orchard, and our whole discourse
Is all of her; say, that thou overheard'st us;
And bid her steal into the pleached Bower,
Where honey-suckles, ripen'd by the Sun,
Forbid the Sun to enter; like to Favourites,
Made proud by Princes, that advance their pride
Against that power that bred it: there will she hide her.
To listen our Purpose; this is thy office,
Bear thee well in it, and leave us alone.
MARGARET
I'll make her come, i warrant, presently. [Exit.
HERO
Now, Ursula, when Beatrice doth come,
As we do trace this alley up and down.
Our Talk must only be of Benedick;
When I do name him, let it be thy Part
To praise him more than ever man did merit.
My Talk to thee must be, how Benedick
Is sick in love with Beatrice; of this matter
Is little Cupid's crafty arrow made,
�P3
214
That only wounds by hear-say: now begin.
Enter Beatrice, running towards the Arbour.
For look, where Beatrice, like lapwing, runs
Close by the ground to hear our conference.
URSULA
The pleasant'st angling is to see the fish
Cut with her golden oars the silver stream,
And greedily devour the treacherous bait;
So angle we for Beatrice, who e'en now
Is couched in the woodbine-coverture;
Fear you not my part of she dialogue.
HERO
Then go we near her, that her ear lose nothing
Of the false-sweet bait that we say for it. ———
No, truly, Ursula, she's too disdainful;
I know, her spirits are as coy and wild
As haggards of the rock.
URSULA
But are you sure,
That Benedick loves Beatrice so entirely?
HERO
So says the Prince, and my new-trothed lord.
URSULA
And did they bid you tell her of it. Madam?
HERO
They did intreat me to acquaint her of it;
But I persuaded them, if they lov'd Benedick,
To wish him wrestle with affection.
And never to let Beatrice know of it.
URSULA Why did you so? doth not the Gentleman
Deserve as full, as fortunate a bed,
As ever Beatrice shall couch upon?
HERO
O God of love! I know, he doth deserve
As much as may be yielded to a man:
�But nature never fram'd a woman's heart
Of prouder stuff than that of Beatrice.
Disdain and scorn ride sparkling in her eyes,
8 Mis-prizing what they look on; and her wit
Values itself so highly, that to her
All matter else seems weak; she cannot love,
215
Nor take no shape nor project of affection.
She is so self-indeared.
URSULA
Sure, I think so;
And therefore certainly it were not good
She knew his love, left she make sport at it.
HERO
Why, you speak truth. I never yet saw man,
how wife, how noble, young, how rarely featur'd.
But she would spell him backward; if fair-fac'd,
She'd swear, the gentleman should be her sister;
9 If black, why Nature, drawing of an antick.
Made a foul blot; if tall, a lance ill- headed;
'If low, an Aglet very vilely cut;
If speaking, why, a vane blown with all winds;
If silent, why, a block moved with none.
So turns she every man the wrong side out.
And never gives to truth and virtue That,
Which simpleness and merit purchaseth.
URSULA
Sure, sure, such carping is not commendable.
HERO
No; for to be so odd, and from all fashions,
216
As Beatrice is, cannot be commendable.
But who dare tell her so? if I should speak.
She'd mock me into air; O, she would laugh me
Out of myself, press me to death with wit.
Therefore let Benedick, like cover'd fire,
Consume away in sighs, waste inwardly;
It were a better death than die with mocks,
Which is as bad as 'tis to die with tickling.
URSULA
�Yet tell her of it; hear what she will say.
HERO
No, rather 1 will go to Benedick,
And counsel him to fight against his passion.
And, truly, I'll devise some honest slanders
To stain my Cousin with! one doth not know,
How much an ill word may impoison liking,
URSULA
O, do not do your Cousin such a wrong.
She cannot be so much without true judgment,
Having so swift and excellent a wit,
As she is priz'd to have, as to refuse
So rare a gentleman as Benedick.
HERO
He is the only man in Italy.
Always excepted my dear Claudio.
URSULA
I pray you, be not angry with me. Madam,
Speaking my fancy; Signior Benedick,
For shape, for bearing, argument and valour,
Goes foremost in report through Italy.
HERO
Indeed, he hath an excellent good name.
URSULA
His Excellence did earn it, ere he had it.
When are you marry'd, Madam?
HERO
Why, every day — to-morrow — Come, go in.
I'll shew thee some attires, and have thy counsel
Which is the best to furnish me to-morrow.
URSULA
She's limb'd, I warrant you; we have caught
her Madam.
HERO
If it prove so, then loving goes by haps;
Some Cupids kill with arrows, Some with traps. [Exeunt.
217
Beatrice, advancing.
�BEATRICE
What fire is in my ears? can this be true?
Stand I condemn'd for Pride and Scorn so much?
Contempt, farewel! and maiden pride, adieu!
No glory lives behind the back of such.
And, Benedick, love on, I will requite thee;
Taming my wild heart to thy loving hand;
If thou dost love, thy kindness shall incite thee
To bind our loves up in a holy band.
For others say, thou dost deserve and I
Believe it better than reportingly. [Exit.
SCENE II.
Leonato's House.
Enter Don Pedro, Claudio, Benedick and Leonato.
PEDRO
I Do but stay 'till your marriage be consummate, and then go I toward Arragon.
CLAUDIO
I'll bring you thither, my lord, if you'll
vouchsafe me.
PEDRO
Nay, That would be as great a soil in the new
gloss of your marriage, as to shew a child his new coat
and forbid him to wear it. I will only be bold with
Benedick for his company; for, from the crown of his
head to the sole of his foot, he is all mirth; he hath
twice or thrice cut Cupid's bow-string, and the little
hangman dare not shoot at him; he hath a heart as
218
found as a bell, and his tongue is the clapper; for
what his heart thinks, his tongue speaks.
BENEDICK
Gallants, I am not as I have been.
LEONATO
So say I; methinks, you are sadder.
CLAUDIO
I hope, he is in love.
�PEDRO
Hang him, truant, there's no true drop of
blood in him, to be truly touch'd with love; if he be
sad, he wants mony.
BENEDICK
I have the tooth-ach.
PEDRO
Draw it.
BENEDICK
Hang it.
CLAUDIO
You must hang it first, and draw it afterwards.
PEDRO
What? Sigh for the tooth-ach!
LEONATO
Which is but a humour, or a worm.
BENEDICK
Well, every one can master a grief, but he
that has it.
CLAUDIO
Yet say I, he is in love.
PEDRO
There is no appearance of fancy in him, unless it be a fancy that he hath to strange disguises, as to
be a Dutch man to day, a French man to morrow; or
in the shape of two countries at once, a German from
the waste downward, all slops; and a Spaniard from
the hip upward, no doublet: Unless he have a fancy
to this foolery, as it appears he hath, he is no fool for
fancy, as you would have it to appear he is.
CLAUDIO
If he be not in love with some woman, there
is no believing old signs; he brushes his hat o' mornings; what should that bode?
PEDRO
Hath any man seen him at the barber's?
�CLAUDIO
No, but the barber's man hath been seen
with him; and the old ornament of his cheek hath
already stuft tennis balls.
LEONATO
Indeed, he looks younger than he did by the
loss of a beard.
219
PEDRO
Nay, he rubs himself with civet; can you
smell him out by that?
CLAUDIO
That's as much as to say, the sweet youth's
in love.
PEDRO
The greatest note of it is his melancholy.
CLAUDIO
And when was he wont to wash his face?
PEDRO
Yea, or to paint himself? for the which, I
hear what they say of him.
CLAUDIO
Nay, but his jesting spirit, which is now crept
into a lute-string and now govern'd by stops.
PEDRO
Indeed, that tells a heavy tale for him. Conclude he is in love.
CLAUDIO
Nay, but I know who loves him.
PEDRO
That would I know too: I warrant, one
that knows him not.
CLAUDIO
Yes, and his ill conditions, and in despight
of all, dies for him.
�PEDRO
She shall be buried with her Face upwards.
BENEDICK
Yet this is no charm for the tooth ach. Old
Signior, walk aside with me, I have study'd eight or
nine wife words to speak to you, which these hobbyhorses must not hear. [Exeunt Benedick and Leonato.
PEDRO
For my life, to break with him about Beatrice.
CLAUDIO
'Tis even so. Hero and Margaret have by
this time play'd their parts with Beatrice; and then the
two bears will not bite one another, when they meet.
220
SCENE III.
Enter Don John
JOHN
My Lord and Brother, God save you.
PEDRO
Good den, brother.
JOHN
If your leisure serv'd, I would speak with you.
PEDRO
In private?
JOHN
If it please you; yet Count Claudio may hear;
for, what I would speak of, concerns him.
PEDRO
What's the matter?
JOHN
Means your lordship to be marry'd to morrow. [To Claudio.
PEDRO
You know, he does.
�JOHN
I know not that, when he knows what I
know.
CLAUDIO
If there be any impediment, I pray you, discover it.
JOHN
You may think, I love you not;
pear hereafter; and aim better
will manifest; for my brother,
well, and in dearness of heart
ensuing marriage; surely, Suit
ill bestow'd!
let that apat me by That I now
I think, he holds you
hath holp to effect your
ill spent, and Labour
PEDRO
Why, what's the matter?
JOHN
I came hither to tell you, and circumstances
shorten'd, (for she hath been too long a talking of)
the Lady is disloyal.
CLAUDIO
Who? Hero?
JOHN
Even she; Leonato's Hero your Hero every
man's Hero.
CLAUDIO
Disloyal?
JOHN
The word is too good to paint out her wickedness; I could say, she were worse; think you of a
worse title, and I will fit her to it. Wonder not 'till
further warrant! go but with me to night, you shall
see her chamber-window enter'd, even the night be221
fore her wedding day; if you love her, then to-morrow wed her but it would better fit your honour to
change your mind.
CLAUDIO
�May this be so?
PEDRO
I will not think it.
JOHN
If you dare not trust that you see, confess not
that you know; if you will follow me, I will shew
you enough; and when you have seen more and heard
more, proceed accordingly.
CLAUDIO
If I see any thing to night why I should not
marry her to-morrow; in the Congregation, where I
should wed, there will I shame her.
PEDRO
And as I wooed for thee to obtain her, I will
join with thee to disgrace her.
JOHN
I will disparage her no farther, 'till you are
my witnesses. Bear it coldly but 'till night, and let
the issue shew itself.
PEDRO
O day untowardly turned!
CLAUDIO
O mischief strangely thwarting!
JOHN
O plague right well prevented!
So you will say. when you have seen the
sequel.
[Exeunt.
SCENE IV.
Changes to the Street.
Enter Dogberry and Verges, with the Watch.
DOGBERRY
ARE you good men and true?
VERGES
Yea, or else it were pity but they
should suffer salvation, body and soul.
�DOGBERRY
Nay, that were a punishment too good for
them, if they should have any allegiance in them,
being chosen for the Prince's Watch.
VERGES
Well, give them their charge, neighbour
Dogberry.
222
DOGBERRY
First, who think you the most desartless man
to be constable?
1 WATCH
Hugh Oatcake, Sir, or George Seacole; for
they can write and read.
DOGBERRY
Come hither, neighbour Seacole: God hath
blest you with a good name: and to be a well-favour'd
man is the gift of fortune, but to write and read
comes by nature.
2 WATCH
Both which, master constable ——
DOGBERRY
You have: I knew, it would be your answer.
Well, for your Favour, Sir, why, give God thanks,
and make no boast of it; and for your writing and
reading, let that appear when there is 8 no need of
such vanity: you are thought here to be the most
senseless and fit man for the Constable of the Watch.
therefore bear you the lanthorn; this is your charge:
you shall comprehend all vagrom men; you are to
bid any man stand, in the Prince's name.
2 WATCH
How if he will not stand?
DOGBERRY
Why, then take no note of him, but let him
go; and presently call the rest of the Watch together,
and thank God you are rid of a knave.
VERGES
�If he will not stand when he is bidden, he is
none of the Prince's Subjects.
DOGBERRY
True, and they are to meddle with none but
the Prince's Subjects: you shall also make no noise in
the streets; for, for the Watch to babble and talk, is
most tolerable, and not to be endur'd.
2 WATCH
We will rather sleep than talk; we know
what belongs to a Watch.
DOGBERRY
Why, you speak like an ancient and most
quiet watchman, for I cannot see how Sleeping should
offend; only have a care that your Bills be not stolen:
223
well, you are to call at all the ale houses, and bid them
that are drunk get them to bed.
2 WATCH
How if they will not?
DOGBERRY
Why then let them alone 'till they are sober;
if they make you not then the better answer, you may
say, they are not the men you took them for.
2 WATCH
Well, Sir.
DOGBERRY
If you meet a thief, you may suspect him by
virtue of your office to be no true man; and for such
kind of men, the less you meddle or make with them,
why, the more is for your honesty.
2 WATCH
If we know him to be a thief, shall we
not lay hands on him?
DOGBERRY
Truly, by your office you may; but, I
think, they that touch pitch will be defil'd: the most
peacable way for you, if you do take a thief, is, to
let him shew himself what he is, and steal out of your
�company.
VERGES
You have been always call'd a merciful man,
Partner.
DOGBERRY
Truly, I would not hang a dog by my will,
much more a man who hath any honesty in him.
VERGES
If you hear a child cry in the night, you must
call to the nurse and bid her still it.
2 WATCH
How if the nurse be asleep, and will not
hear us?
DOGBERRY
Why, then depart in Peace, and let the child
wake her with crying: for the ewe that will not hear
her lamb when it baes, will never answer a calf when
he bleats.
VERGES
'Tis very true.
DOGBERRY
This is the end of the Charge: you, constable, are to present the Prince's own person; if you meet
the Prince in the night, you may stay him.
224
VERGES
Nay, bi'rlady, that, I think, he cannot.
DOGBERRY
Five shillings to one on't with any man that
knows the Statues, he may stay him; marry, not without the Prince be willing: for, indeed, the Watch
ought to offend no man; and it is an offence to stay a
man against his will.
VERGES
Bi'rlady, I think, it be so.
DOGBERRY
Ha, ha, ha! well, masters, good night; an
�there be any matter of weight chances, call up me;
keep your fellow's counsels and your own, and good
night; come, neighbour.
2 WATCH
Well, masters, we hear our charge; let
us go sit hereupon the church-bench 'till two, and
then all to bed.
DOGBERRY
One word more, honest neighbours. I pray
you, watch about Signior Leonato's door, for the Wedding being there to-morrow, there is a great coil to
night; adieu; be vigilant, I beseech you.
[Exeunt Dogberry and Verges.
SCENE V.
Enter Borachio and Conrade.
BORACHIO
What! Conrade ——
WATCH.
Peace, stir not. [Aside.
BORACHIO
Conrade, I say!
CONRADE
Here, man, I am at thy elbow.
BORACHIO
Mass, and my elbow itch'd, I thought there
would a scab follow.
CONRADE
I will owe thee an answer for that, and now
forward with thy tale.
BORACHIO
Stand thee close then under this pent-house,
for it drizzles rain, and I will, like a true drunkard,
utter all to thee.
WATCH
[Aside.] Some Treason, matters; yet stand
close.
�225
BORACHIO
Therefore know, I have earned of Don John
a thousand ducats.
CONRADE
Is it possible that any Villany should be so
dear?
BORACHIO
Thou should'st rather ask, if it were possible
any villany should be so rich? for when rich villains
have need of poor ones, poor ones may make what
price they will.
CONRADE
I wonder at it.
BORACHIO
That shews, thou art unconfirm'd; thou
knowest, that the fashion of a doublet or a hat, or a
cloak, is nothing to a man.
CONRADE
Yes, it is apparel.
BORACHIO
I mean the fashion.
CONRADE
Yes, the fashion is the fashion.
BORACHIO
Tush, I may as well say, the fool's the fool;
but see'st thou not, what a deformed thief this fashion
is?
WATCH
I know that Deformed; he has been a vile
thief these seven years; he goes up and down like a
gentleman: I remember his name.
BORACHIO
Didst thou not hear some body?
CONRADE
No, 'twas the vane on the house.
�BORACHIO
Seest thou not, I say, what a deformed thief
this fashion is? how giddily he turns about all the hotbloods between fourteen and five and thirty; sometimes,
fashioning them like Pharao's soldiers in the reechy
Painting; sometimes, like the God Bell's priests in the
old church window; 3 sometimes, like the shaven Her-
226
cules in the smirch'd worm-eaten tapestry, where his
codpiece seems as massy as his club.
CONRADE
All this I see, and see, that the fashion wears
out more apparel than the man; but art not thou thyself giddy with the fashion too, that thou hast shifted
out of thy tale into telling me of the fashion?
BORACHIO
Not so neither but know, that I have tonight wooed Margaret, the Lady Hero's Gentlewoman,
by the name of Hero; she leans me out at her mistress's
chamber-window, bids me a thousand times good
night — I tell this tale vilely —— I should first tell thee,
how the Prince, Claudio, and my master, planted and
placed, and possessed by my master Don John saw a
far off in the orchard this amiable encounter.
CONRADE
And thought they, Margaret was Hero?
BORACHIO
Two of them did, the Prince and Claudio;
but the devil my master knew she was Margaret; and
partly by his oaths, which first possest them, partly by
the dark night, which did deceive them, but chiefly
by my villany, which, did confirm any slander that
Don John had made, away went Claudio enraged;
swore, he would meet her as he was appointed next
morning at the Temple, and there before the whole
227
Congregation shame her with what he saw o'er night,
and send her home again without a husband.
�1 WATCH
We charge you in the Prince's name,
stand.
2 WATCH
Call up the right master constable; we
have here recovered the moll dangerous piece of lechery that ever was known in the common-wealth.
1 WATCH
And one Deformed is one of them; I
know him, he wears a lock.
CONRADE
Masters, masters.
2 WATCH
You'll be made bring Deformed forth, I
warrant you.
CONRADE
Masters.
1 WATCH
Never speak; we charge you, let us obey
you to go with us.
BORACHIO
We are like to prove a goodly Commodity,
being taken up of these mens bills.
CONRADE
A commodity in question, I warrant you.
Come, we'll obey you.
SCENE VI.
Hero's Apartment in Leonato's House,
Enter Hero, Margaret and Ursula.
HERO
Good Ursula, wake my cousin Beatrice,
and desire her to rise.
URSULA
I will, lady.
HERO
�And bid her come hither.
228
URSULA
Well. [Exit Ursula.
MARGARET
Troth, I think, your other Rebato were
better.
HERO
No, pray thee, good Meg, I'll wear this.
MARGARET
By my troth, it's not so good; and I warrant, your cousin will say so.
HERO
My cousin's i fool, and thou art another.
I'll wear none but this.
MARGARET
I like the new tire within excellently, if the
hair were a thought browner; and your gown's a moil
rare fashion, i'faith. I saw the Dutchess of Milan's
gown, that they praise so.
HERO
O, that exceeds, they say.
MARGARET
By my troth, it's but a night-gown in respect of yours; cloth of gold and cuts, and lac'd
with silver, set with pearls down-sleeves, side-sleeves
and skirts, round underborne with a blueish tinsel; but
for a fine, queint, graceful and excellent fashion, yours
is worth ten on't.
HERO
God give me joy to wear it, for my heart is
exceeding heavy!
MARGARET
'Twill be heavier soon by the weight of a
man.
HERO
Fie upon thee, art not asham'd?
�MARGARET
Of what, lady? of speaking honourably?
is not marriage honourable in a beggar? is not your
Lord honourable without marriage? I think, you would
have me say (saving your reverence) a husband. If bad
thinking do not wrest true speaking, I'll offend no body; is there any harm in the heavier for a Husband?
none, I think, if it be the right Husband, and the
right wife, otherwise 'tis light and not heavy; ask my
lady Beatrice else, here she comes.
229
SCENE VII.
Enter Beatrice.
HERO
Good morrow, coz.
BEATRICE
Good morrow, sweet Hero.
HERO
Why, how now? do you speak in the sick
tune?
BEATRICE
I am out of all other tune, methinks.
MARGARET
Clap us into Light o' love; that goes without a burden; do you sing it, and I'll dance it.
BEATRICE
Yes, Light o' love with your heels, then if
your husband have stables enough, you'll look he shall
lack no barns.
MARGARET
O illegitimate construction! I scorn that
with my heels.
BEATRICE
'Tis almost five o'clock, cousin; 'tis time you
were ready. By my troth, I am exceeding ill— hey ho!
MARGARET
�For a hawk, a horse, or a husband?
BEATRICE
'For the letter that begins them all, H.
MARGARET
Well, if you be not turn'd Turk, there's
no more failing by the star.
BEATRICE
What means the fool, trow?
MARGARET
Nothing I, but God send every one their
heart's desire!
HERO
These gloves the count sent me, they are an
excellent perfume.
Q3
230
BEATRICE
I am stufft, cousin, I cannot smell.
MARGARET
A maid, and stufft! there's goodly catching
of cold.
BEATRICE
O, God help me, God help me, how long
have you profest apprehension?
MARGARET
Ever since you left it; doth not my wit become me rarely?
BEATRICE
It is not seen enough, you should wear it in
your cap — By my troth, I am sick.
MARGARET
Get you some of this distill'd Carduus Benedictus, and lay it to your heart; it is the only thing
for a qualm.
HERO
�There thou prick'st her with a thistle.
BEATRICE
Benedictus? why Benedictus? you have some
moral in this Benedictus.
MARGARET
Moral? no, by my troth, I have no moral
meaning, I meant plain holy thistle: you may think,
perchance, that I think you are in love; nay, bi'rlady,
I am not such a fool to think what I list; nor I list
not to think what I can; nor, indeed, I cannot think,
if I would think my heart out with thinking, that you
are in love, or that you will be in love, or that you
can be in love; yet Benedick was such another, and
now is he become a man; he swore, he would never
marry and yet now, in despight of his heart, 2 he
eats his meat without grudging; and how you may be
converted, I know not; but, methinks, you look
with your eyes as other women do.
231
BEATRICE
What pace is this that thy tongue keeps?
MARGARET
Not a false gallop.
Enter Ursula.
URSULA
Madam, withdraw; the Prince, the Count,
Signior Benedick, Don JOHN and all the Gallants of
the town, are come to fetch you to Church.
HERO Help to dress me, good coz, good Meg, good
Ursula. [Exeunt.
SCENE VIII.
Another Apartment in Leonato's House.
Enter Leonato, with Dogberry and Verges.
LEONATO
WHAT would you with me, honest neighbour?
DOGBERRY
�Marry, Sir, I would have some confidence
with you, that decerns you nearly.
LEONATO
Brief, I pray you; for you see, 'tis a busy
time with me.
DOGBERRY
Marry, this it is. Sir.
VERGES
Yes, in truth it is, Sir.
LEONATO
What is it, my good friends?
DOGBERRY
Goodman Verges, Sir, speaks a little of the
matter: an old man, Sir, and his wits are not so blunt,
as, God help, I would desire they were; but, in faith,
as honest as the skin between his brows.
VERGES
Yes, I thank God, I am as honest as any man
living, that is an old man, and no honester than I.
Q4
232
DOGBERRY
Comparisons are odorous: palabras, neighbour Verges.
LEONATO
Neighbours, you are tedious.
DOGBERRY
It pleases your worship to say so, but we are
the poor Duke's officers; but, truly, for mine own
part, if I were as tedious as a king, I could find in
my heart to bestow it all of your worship.
LEONATO
All thy tediousness on me, ha?
DOGBERRY
Yea, and 'twere a thou land times more than
'tis, for I hear as good exclamation on your worship
�as of any man in the city; and tho' I be but a poor
man, I am glad to hear it.
VERGES
And so am I.
LEONATO
I would fain know what you have to say.
VERGES
Marry, Sir, our Watch to night, excepting
your Worship's presence, hath ta'en a couple of as
arrant knaves as any in Messina.
DOGBERRY
A good old man, Sir; he will be talking, as
they say when the age is in, the wit is out; God help
us, it is a world to see — well said, i'faith, neighbour
Verges — well, he's a good man 4 ; an two men ride
an horse, one must ride behind — an honest foul, i'faith,
Sir, by my troth he is, as ever broke bread, but God
is to be worshipp'd; all men are not alike, alas, good
neighbour!
LEONATO
Indeed, neighbour, he comes too short of
you.
DOGBERRY
Gifts, that God gives.
LEONATO
I must leave you.
233
DOGBERRY
One word, Sir; our Watch have, indeed,
comprehended two auspicious persons; and we would
have them this morning examin'd before your Worship.
LEONATO
Take their examination yourself, and bring
it me; I am now in great haste, as may appear unto
you.
DOGBERRY
It shall be suffigance.
�LEONATO
Drink some wine ere you go: fare you well.
Enter a Messenger.
MESSENGER
My lord, they stay for you to give your
daughter to her husband.
LEONATO
I'll wait upon them. I am ready.
[Exeunt Leonato.
DOGBERRY
Go, good Partner, go get you to Francis
Seacoale, bid him bring his pen and inkhorn to the
jail; we are now to examine those men.
VERGES
And we must do it wisely.
DOGBERRY
We will spare for no wit, I warrant; here's
That [touching his forehead] shall drive some of them
to a non-come. Only get the learned writer to set
down our excommunication, and meet me at the Jail.
[Exeunt.
234
ACT IV. SCENE I.
A Church.
Enter D. Pedro, D. John, Leonato, Friar. Claudio,
Benedick, Hero and Beatrice.
LEONATO
Come, friar Francis, be brief, only to the plain
form of marriage, and you shall recount their
particular duties afterwards.
FRIAR
You come hither, my Lord, to marry this
lady?
CLAUDIO
No.
�LEONATO
To be married to her, Friar. You come to
marry her.
FRIAR
Lady, you come hither to be married to
this Count.
HERO
I do.
FRIAR.
If either of you know any inward impediment why you should not be conjoined, I charge you
on your souls to utter it.
CLAUDIO
Know you any, Hero?
HERO
None, my Lord.
FRIAR
Know you any, Count?
LEONATO
I dare make his answer, none.
CLAUDIO
O what men dare do! what men may do!
what
Men daily do! not knowing what they do!
BENEDICK
How now! Interjections? why, then some
be of laughing, as, ha, ha, he!
CLAUDIO
Stand thee by, friar: father, by your leave,
Will you with free and unconstrained soul
235
Give me this maid your daughter?
LEONATO
As freely, son, as God did give her me.
�CLAUDIO
And what have I to give you back, whose worth
May counterpoise this rich and precious gift?
PEDRO
Nothing, unless you render her again.
CLAUDIO
Sweet Prince, you learn me noble thankfulness:
There, Leonato, take her back again;
Give not this rotten orange to your friend.
She's but the sign and semblance of her honour:
Behold, how like a maid she blushes here!
O, what authority and shew of truth
Can cunning sin cover itself withal!
Comes not that blood, as modest evidence,
To witness simple virtue? would you not swear,
All you that see her, that she were a maid,
By these exterior shows? but she is none:
She knows the heat of a luxurious bed;
Her blush is guiltiness, not modesty.
LEONATO
What do you mean, my Lord?
CLAUDIO
Not to be married,
Not to knit my soul to an approved Wanton.
LEONATO
Dear my Lord, if you in your own approof
Have vanquished the resistance of her youth,
And made defeat of her virginity
CLAUDIO
I know what you would say. If I have
known her,
236
You'll say, she did embrace me as a husband,
And so extenuate the forehand sin.
No, Leonato,
I never tempted her with word too large8;
But, as a brother to his sister, showed
Bashful sincerity, and comely love.
HERO
�And seemed I ever otherwise to you?
CLAUDIO
Out on thy Seeming! I will write against it9:
You seem to me as Dian in her orb,
As chaste as is the bud1 ere it be blown:
But you are more intemperate in your blood
Than Venus, or those pampered animals
That rage in savage sensuality.
HERO
Is my Lord well, that he doth speak so wide?
LEONATO
Sweet Prince, why speak not you?
PEDRO
What should I speak?
I stand dishonoured, that have gone about
To link my dear friend to a common Stale.
LEONATO
Are these things spoken, or do I but dream;
JOHN
Sir, they are spoken, and these things are true.
BENEDICK
This looks not like a Nuptial.
HERO
True! O God!
CLAUDIO
Leonato, stand I here?
Is this the Prince? Is this the Prince's Brother?
Is this face Hero's? are our eyes our own;
LEONATO
All this is so; but what of this, my lord?
CLAUDIO
Let me but move one question to your
daughter.
And, by that fatherly and kindly power
That you have in her, bid her answer truly.
237
�LEONATO
I charge thee do so, as thou art my child.
HERO
O God defend me, how am I beset!
What kind of catechizing call you this?
CLAUDIO
To make you answer truly to your name.
HERO
Is it not Hero? who can blot that name
With any just reproach?
CLAUDIO
Marry, that can Hero;
Hero herself can blot out Hero's virtue.
What man was he talked with you yesternight
Out at your window betwixt twelve and one?
Now, if you are a maid, answer to this.
HERO
I talked with no man at that hour, my Lord.
PEDRO
Why, then you are no maiden. Leonato,
I am sorry, you must hear; upon mine Honour,
Myself, my Brother, and this grieved Count
Did see her, hear her, at that hour last night.
Talk with a ruffian at her chamber window;
Who hath, indeed, most like a liberal villain3,
Confessed the vile encounters they have had,
A thousand times in secret.
JOHN
Fie, fie, they are not to be named, my Lord.
Not to be spoken of;
There is not chastity enough in language.
Without offence, to utter them: thus, pretty lady,
I am sorry for thy much misgovernment.
CLAUDIO
O Hero! what a Hero hadst thou been,
If half thy outward graces had been placed
About the thoughts and counsels of thy heart?
But fare thee well, most soul, most fair! farewel,
Thou pure impiety, and impious purity!
For thee I'll lock up all the gates of love,
And on my eyelids shall Conjecture hang,
�To turn all beauty into thoughts of harm;
238
And never shall it more be gracious.
LEONATO
Hath no man's dagger here a point for me?
BEATRICE
Why, how now, Cousin, wherefore sink you
down?
JOHN
Come, let us go; these things, come thus
to light,
Smother her spirits up.
[Exeunt D. Pedro, D, John and Claudio
SCENE II.
BENEDICK
How doth the lady?
BEATRICE
Dead, I think; help, uncle.
Hero! why, Hero! uncle! Signior Benedick! Friar!
LEONATO
O fate! take not away thy heavy hand;
Death is the fairest cover for her shame.
That may be wished for.
BEATRICE
How now, cousin Hero?
FRIAR.
Have comfort, Lady.
LEONATO
Dost thou look up?
FRIAR.
Yea, wherefore should she not?
LEONATO
Wherefore? why, doth not every earthly
thing
Cry shame upon her? could she here deny
�The story that is printed in her blood5?
Do not live, Hero, do not ope thine eyes:
For did I think, thou wouldst not quickly die,
Thought I, thy spirits were stronger than thy shames,
Myself would on the rearward of reproaches
Strike at thy life. Grieved I, I had but one?
Chid I for That at frugal nature's frame?
239
I've one too much by thee. Why had I one?
Why ever wast thou lovely in my eyes?
Why had I not, with charitable hand,
Took up a beggar's issue at my gates?
Who smirched thus, and mired with infamy,
I might have said, no part of it is mine;
This shame derives itself from unknown loins.
But mine, and mine I lov'd, and mine I praised,
And mine that I was proud on, mine so much.
That I myself was to myself not mine,
Valuing of her; why, she, O, she is fallen
Into a pit of ink, that the wide sea
Hath drops too few to wash her clean again;
240
And salt too little, which may season give
To her soul tainted flesh!
BENEDICK
Sir, Sir, be patient;
For my part, I am so attir'd in wonder,
I know not what to say.
BEATRICE
O, on my soul, my cousin is bely'd.
BENEDICK
Lady, were you her bedfellow last night?
BEATRICE
No, truly, not; altho' until last night
I have this twelvemonth been her bedfellow.
LEONATO
Confirmed, confirmed! O, That is stronger
made,
Which was before barr'd up with ribs of iron.
Would the two Princes lie? and Claudio lie?
�Who lov'd her so, that, speaking of her soulness,
Washed it with tears? hence from her, let her die.
FRIAR
Hear me a little,
For I have only been silent so long,
And given way unto this course of fortune.
By noting of the lady. I have mark'd
A thousand blushing apparitions
To start into her face; a thousand innocent shames
In angel whiteness bear away those blushes;
And in her eye there hath appear'd a fire,
To burn the errors that these Princes hold
Against her maiden truth. Call me a fool,
Trust not my reading, nor my observations,
Which with experimental seal doth warrant
The tenour of my book; trust not my age,
My reverence, calling, nor divinity,
If this sweet lady lie not guiltless here
Under some biting error.
LEONATO
Friar, it cannot be;
Thou seest, that all the grace, that she hath left.
Is, that she will not add to her damnation
A sin of perjury; she not denies it:
Why seek'st thou then to cover with excuse
That, which appears in proper nakedness?
241
FRIAR
Lady, what man is he you are accused of?
HERO
They know, that do accuse me; I know
none:
If I know more of any man alive,
Than that which maiden modesty doth warrant,
Let all my sins lack mercy! O my father,
Prove you that any man with me conversed
At hours unmeet, or that I yesternight
Maintained the change of words with any creature,
Refuse me, hate me, torture me to death.
FRIAR
There is some strange misprision in the Princes.
BENEDICK
�Two of them have the very bent of honour,
And if their wisdoms be misled in this,
The Practice of it lives in John the bastard,
Whose spirits toil in frame of villanies.
LEONATO
I know not: if they speak but truth of her,
these hands shall tear her; if they wrong her honour,
The proudest of them shall well hear of it.
Time hath not yet so dried this blood of mine,
Nor age so eat up my invention,
Nor fortune made such havoc of my means,
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242
Nor my bad life rest me so much of friends,
But they shall find awaked, in such a kind,
Both strength of limb, and policy of mind,
Ability in means, and choice of friends,
To quit me of them thoroughly.
FRIAR
Pause a while,
And let my counsel sway you in this case.
Your daughter here the Princes left for dead1;
Let her awhile be secretly kept in,
And publish it, that she is dead, indeed:
Maintain a mourning ostentation,
And on your family's old Monument
Hang mournful Epitaphs, and do all rites
That appertain unto a burial.
LEONATO
What shall become of this? what will this do?
FRIAR
Marry, this, well carried, shall on her behalf
Change slander to remorse; that is some good:
But not for that dream I on this strange course,
But on this travail look for greater birth:
She dying, as it must be so maintained,
Upon the instant that she was accused,
Shall be lamented, pitied, and excused,
Of every hearer: for it so falls out,
That what we have we prize not to the worth,
Whiles we enjoy it; but being lacked and lost,
�Why, then we reck the value; then we find
The virtue that possession would not show us
Whiles it was ours; so will it fare with Claudio:
243
When he shall hear she died upon his words,
Th'idea of her Life shall sweetly creep
Into his study of imagination,
And every lovely organ of her life
Shall come apparelled in more precious habit;
More moving, delicate, and full of life,
Into the eye and prospect of his soul.
Than when she lived indeed. Then shall he mourn,
If ever love had interest in his liver,
And wish, he had not so accused her;
No, though he thought his accusation true:
Let this be so, and doubt not, but success
Will fashion the event in better shape
Than I can lay it down in likelihood.
But if all Aim but this be levelled false,
The supposition of the lady's death
Will quench the wonder of her infamy.
And, if it sort not well, you may conceal her,
As best befits her wounded reputation,
In some reclusive and religious life,
Out of all eyes, tongues, minds, and injuries.
BENEDICK
Signior Leonato, let the friar advise you:
And though you know, my inwardness and love
Is very much unto the Prince and Claudio,
Yet, by mine honour, I will deal in this
As secretly and justly as your soul
Should with your body.
LEONATO
Being that I flow in grief,
The smallest twine may lead me.
FRIAR
'Tis well consented, presently away;
For to strange sores, strangely they strain the cure.
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244
Come, lady, die to live; this wedding day,
�Perhaps, is but prolonged: have patience and
endure.
[Exeunt.
SCENE III.
Manent Benedick and Beatrice.
BENEDICK
Lady Beatrice, have you wept all this while?
BEATRICE
Yea, and I will weep a while longer.
BENEDICK
I will not desire that.
BEATRICE
You have no reason, I do it freely.
BENEDICK
Surely, I do believe, your fair cousin is
wrong'd.
BEATRICE
Ah, how much might the man deserve of me,
that would right her!
BENEDICK
Is there any way to show such friendship?
BEATRICE
A very even way, but no such friend.
BENEDICK
May a man do it?
BEATRICE
It is a man's office, but not yours.
BENEDICK
I do love nothing in the world so well as you;
is not that strange?
BEATRICE
As strange as the thing I know not; it were
as possible for me to say, I lov'd nothing so well as
you; but believe me not; and yet I lie not; I con245
�fess nothing, nor I deny nothing. I am sorry for my
cousin.
BENEDICK
By my sword, Beatrice, thou lov'st me.
BEATRICE
Do not swear by it, and eat it.
BENEDICK
I will swear by it that you love me; and I
will make him eat it, that says, I love not you.
BEATRICE
Will you not eat your word?
BENEDICK
With no sauce that can be devis'd to it; I
protest, I love thee.
BEATRICE
Why then, God forgive me.
BENEDICK
What offence, sweet Beatrice?
BEATRICE
You have stay'd me in a happy hour; I was
about to protest, I lov'd you.
BENEDICK
And do it with all thy heart.
BEATRICE
I love you with so much of my heart, that
none is left to protest.
BENEDICK
Come, bid me do any thing for thee.
BEATRICE
Kill Claudio.
BENEDICK
Ha! not for the wide world.
BEATRICE
You kill me to deny; farewel.
�BENEDICK
Tarry, sweet Beatrice.
BEATRICE
I am gone, tho' I am here; there is no love
in you; nay, I pray you, let me go.
BENEDICK
Beatrice, --BEATRICE
In faith, I will go.
BENEDICK
We'll be friends first.
BEATRICE
You dare easier be friends with me, than fight
with mine enemy.
BENEDICK
Is Claudio thine enemy?
BEATRICE
Is he not approved in the height a villain,
that hath slandered, scorned, dishonoured my kinswoman! O, that I were a man! what! bear her in hand
until they come to take hands, and then with public
accusation, uncovered slander, unmitigated rancour O God, that I were a man! I would eat his heart in
the market-place.
BENEDICK
Hear me, Beatrice.
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246
BEATRICE
Talk with a man out at a window? - a proper saying!
BENEDICK
Nay, but Beatrice.
BEATRICE
Sweet Hero! She is wrong'd, she is slander'd,
�she is undone.
BENEDICK
Beat ---BEATRICE
Princes and Counts! Surely, a princely testimony, a goodly count-comfect, a sweet gallant, surely!
O that I were a man for his sake! Or that I had any
friend would be a man for my sake! but manhood is
melted into curtesies, valour into compliment, and
men are only turned into tongue, and trim ones too;
he is now as valiant as Hercules, that only tells a lye,
and swears it: I cannot be a man with wishing, therefore I will die a woman with grieving.
BENEDICK
Tarry, good Beatrice; by this hand, I love
thee.
BEATRICE
Use it for my love some other way than swearing by it.
BENEDICK
Think you in your soul, the Count Claudio
hath wrong'd Hero ?
BEATRICE
Yea, as sure as I have a thought or a soul.
BENEDICK
Enough, I am engag'd; I will challenge him,
I will kiss your hand, and so leave you; by this hand,
Claudio shall render me a dear account as you hear of
me, so think of me go comfort your cousin; I must
say, she is dead, and so farewel. [Exeunt.
SCENE IV.
Changes to a Prison.
Enter Dogberry, Verges, Borachio, Conrade, the
Town Clerk and Sexton in Gowns.
TOWN CLERK
Is our whole dissembly appear'd?
DOGBERRY
O, a stool and a cushion for the
�sexton!
247
SEXTON
Which be the malefactors?
VERGES
Marry, that am I and my Partner.
DOGBERRY
Nay, that's certain, we have the exhibition
to examine.
SEXTON
But which are the offenders that are to be
examin'd? let them come before master constable.
TOWN CLERK
Yea, marry, let them come before me; what
is your name, friend?
BORACHIO
Borachio.
TOWN CLERK
Pray, write down, Borachio. Yours, Sirrah?
CONRADE
I am a gentleman, Sir, and my name is
Conrade.
TOWN CLERK
Write down, master gentleman Conrade;
masters, do you serve God?
CONRADE, BORACHIO
Yea, Sir, we hope.
TOWN CLERK
Write down, that they hope they serve God:
and write God first: for God defend, but God should
go before such villains Masters, it is proved already
that you are little better than false knaves, and it will
go near to be thought so shortly; how answer you
for yourselves?
CONRADE
Marry, Sir, we say, we are none.
�TOWN CLERK
A marvellous witty fellow, I assure you, but
I will go about with him. Come you hither, sirrah,
a word in your ear. Sir; I say to you, it is thought you
are both false knaves.
BORACHIO
Sir, I say to you, we are none.
TOWN CLERK
Well, stand aside; 'fore God, they are both
in a tale; have you writ down, that they are none?
SEXTON
Master town clerk, you go not the way to
R4
248
examine, you must call the watch that are their
accusers.
TOWN CLERK
Yea, marry, that's the deftest way, let the
Watch come forth; masters, I charge you in the
Prince's name accuse these men.
Enter Watchmen.
1 WATCH
This man said, Sir, that Don John the
Prince's brother was a villain.
TOWN CLERK
Write down, Prince John a villain; why
this is flat perjury, to call a Prince's brother villain.
BORACHIO
Master town-clerk ------TOWN CLERK
Pray thee, fellow, Peace; I do not like thy
look, I promise thee.
SEXTON
What heard you him say else
�2 WATCH
Marry, that he had receiv'd a thousand
ducats of Don John, for accusing the lady Hero wrongfully.
TOWN CLERK
Flat burglary, as ever was committed.
DOGBERRY
Yea, by th' mass, that it is.
SEXTON
What else, fellow?
1 WATCH
And that Count Claudio did mean, upon
249
his words, to disgrace Hero before the whole assembly,
and not marry her.
TOWN CLERK
O villain! thou wilt be condemn'd into
everlasting redemption for this.
SEXTON
What else?
2 WATCH
This is all.
SEXTON
And this is more, masters, than you can
deny. Prince John is this morning secretly stoll'n
away: Hero was in this manner accus'd, and in this
very manner refus'd, and upon the grief of this suddenly dy'd. Master Constable, let those men be bound
and brought to Leonato; I will go before, and shew
him their examination.
Exit.
DOGBERRY
Come let them be opinion'd.
SEXTON
Let them be in hand.
250
�CONRADE
Off, Coxcomb.
DOGBERRY
God's my life, where's the Sexton? let him
write down the Prince's officer Coxcomb: come, bind
them, thou naughty varlet.
CONRADE
Away! you are an ass, you are an ass -----DOGBERRY
Dost thou not suspect my place? dost thou
not suspect my years? O that he were here to write me
down an ass! but, masters, remember, that I am an
ass; though it be not written down, yet forget not
that I am an ass; no, thou villain, thou art lull of
piety, as shall be prov'd upon thee by good witness;
I am a wise fellow, and which is more, an officer;
and which is more, an housholder; and which is more,
as pretty a piece of flesh as any in Messina, and one
that knows the law; go to, and a rich fellow enough;
go to, and a fellow that hath had losses; and one
that hath two gowns, and every thing handsome about
him; bring him away; O, that I had been writ
down an ass! -----[Exeunt.
ACT V. SCENE I.
Before Leonato's House.
Enter Leonato and Antonio.
ANTONIO
IF you go on thus, you will kill yourself;
And 'tis not wisdom thus to second grief
Against yourself.
LEONATO
I pray thee, cease thy counsel,
Which falls into mine ears as profitless
As water in a sieve; give not me counsel,
Nor let no Comforter delight mine ear,
251
But such a one whose wrongs do suite with mine.
Bring me a father, that so lov'd his child,
Whose joy of her is overwhelm'd like mine.
And bid him speak of patience;
�Measure his woe the length and breadth of mine,
And let it answer every strain for strain:
As thus for thus, and such a grief for such,
In every lineament, branch, shape and form.
If such a one will smile and stroke his beard,
And, Sorrow wag! cry; hem, when he should groan;
Patch grief with proverbs; make misfortune drunk
With candle-wasters; bring him yet to me.
And I of him will gather patience.
But there is no such man; for, brother, men
Can counsel, and give comfort to that grief
252
Which they themselves not feel; but tasting it,
Their counsel turns to passion, which before
Would give preceptial medicine to rage;
Fetter strong madness in a silken thread;
Charm ach with air, and agony with words.
No, no; 'tis all mens office to speak patience
To those, that wring under the load of sorrow;
But no man's virtue, nor sufficiency,
To be so moral, when he shall endure
The like himself; therefore give me no counsel;
My griefs cry louder than advertisement.
ANTONIO
Therein do men from children nothing differ.
LEONATO
I pray thee, peace; I will be flesh and blood;
For there was never yet philosopher,
That could endure the tooth-ach patiently;
However they have writ the style of Gods,
And made a push at chance and sufferance.
ANTONIO
Yet bend not all the harm upon yourself:
Make those, that do offend you, suffer too.
LEONATO
There thou speak'st reason; nay, I will do so.
My soul doth tell me, Hero is bely'd;
And that shall Claudio know, so shall the Prince;
And all of them, that thus dishonour her.
SCENE II.
Enter Bon Pedro, and Claudio.
�ANTONIO
Here comes the Prince and Claudio hastily.
PEDRO
Good den, good den.
253
CLAUDIO
Good day to both of you.
LEONATO
Hear you, my lords?
PEDRO
We have some haste, Leonato.
LEONATO
Some haste, my lord! well, fare you well,
my lord.
Are you so hasty now? well, all is one.
PEDRO
Nay, do not quarrel with us, good old man.
ANTONIO
If he could right himself with quarrelling,
Some of us would lye low.
CLAUDIO
Who wrongs him?
LEONATO
Marry, thou dost wrong me, thou dissembler,
thou!
Nay, never lay thy hand upon thy sword,
I fear thee not.
CLAUDIO
Marry, beshrew my hand,
If it should give your age such cause of fear;
In faith, my hand meant nothing to my sword.
LEONATO
Tush, tush, man, never fleer and jest at me;
I speak not like a dotard, nor a fool;
As, under privilege of age, to brag
What I have done being young, or what would do,
Were I not old: know, Claudio, to thy head,
�Thou hast so wrong'd my innocent child and me,
That I am forc'd to lay my reverence by;
And, with grey hairs, and bruise of many days.
Do challenge thee to tryal of a man;
I say, thou hast bely'd mine innocent child.
Thy slander hath gone through and through her heart,
And she lyes bury'd with her ancestors,
O, in a tomb where never scandal slept,
Save this of hers, fram'd by thy villany!
CLAUDIO
My villany?
LEONATO
Thine, Claudio; thine, I say.
PEDRO
You say not right, old man.
LEONATO
My lord, my lord,
I'll prove it on his body, if he dare;
Despight his nice fence and his active practice,
His May of youth, and bloom of lustyhood.
254
CLAUDIO
Away, I will not have to do with you.
LEONATO
Canst thou so daffe me? thou hast kill'd my
child;
If thou kill'st me, boy, thou shalt kill a man.
ANTONIO
He shall kill two of us, and men indeed;
But that's no matter, let him kill one first;
Win me and wear me, let him answer me;
Come, follow me, boy; come, boy, follow me;
Sir boy, I'll whip you from your foining fence;
Nay, as I am a gentleman, I will.
LEONATO
Brother, -----ANTONIO
Content yourself; God knows, I lov'd my
Niece;
�And she is dead, slander'd to death by villains,
That dare as well answer a man, indeed,
As I dare take a serpent by the tongue.
Boys, apes, braggarts, jacks, milksops!
LEONATO
Brother Anthony ----ANTONIO
Hold you content; what, man? I know them,
yea,
And what they weigh, even to the utmost scruple:
Scambling, out facing, fashion mongring boys,
255
That lye, and cog, and flout, deprave and slander,
Go antickly and show an outward hideousness,
And speak off half a dozen dangerous words,
How they might hurt their enemies, if they durst;
And this is all.
LEONATO
But, brother Anthony, ----ANTONIO
Come, 'tis no matter:
Do not you meddle, let me deal in this.
PEDRO
Gentlemen both, we will not wake your
patience.
My heart is sorry for your daughter's death;
But, on my Honour, she was charg'd with nothing
But what was true, and very full of proof.
LEONATO
My lord, my lord ----PEDRO
I will not hear you.
LEONATO
No! come, brother, away, I will be heard.
ANTONIO
And shall, or some of us will smart for it.
Ex. ambo.
�SCENE III.
Enter Benedick.
PEDRO
See, see, here comes the man we went to seek.
CLAUDIO
Now Signior, what news?
BENEDICK
Good day, my lord.
256
PEDRO
Welcome, Signior; you are almost come to
part almost a fray.
CLAUDIO
We had like to have had our two noses snapt
off with two old men without teeth.
PEDRO
Leonato and his brother; what think'st thou?
had we fought, I doubt, we should have been too
young for them.
BENEDICK
In a false quarrel there is no true valour: I
came to seek you both.
CLAUDIO
We have been up and down to seek thee;
for we are high-proof melancholy, and would fain
have it beaten away: wilt thou use thy wit?
BENEDICK
It is in my scabbard; shall I draw it?
PEDRO
Dost thou wear thy wit by thy side?
CLAUDIO
Never any did so, though very many have
been beside their wit. I will bid thee draw, as we do
the minstrels; draw, to pleasure us.
�PEDRO
As I am an honest man, he looks' pale; art
thou sick or angry?
CLAUDIO
What? courage, man: what tho' care kill'd
a cat, thou hast mettle enough in thee to kill care.
BENEDICK
Sir, I shall meet your wit in the career, if
you charge it against me - I pray you, chuse another
subject.
CLAUDIO
Nay then give him another staff; this last
was broke cross.
PEDRO
By this light, he changes more and more: I
think, he be angry, indeed.
CLAUDIO
If he be, he knows how to turn his girdle.
BENEDICK
Shall I speak a word in your ear?
CLAUDIO
God bless me from a challenge!
BENEDICK
You are a villain; I jest not. I will make it
257
good how you dare, with what yon dare, and when
you dare. Do me right, or I will protest your cowardise. You have kill'd a sweet lady, and her death
shall fall heavy on you. Let me hear from you.
CLAUDIO
Well, I will meet you, so I may have good
cheer.
PEDRO What, a feast?
CLAUDIO
I'faith, I thank him; he hath bid me to a
�calves-head and a capon, the which if I do not carve
most curiously, say, my knife's naught. Shall I not
find a woodcock too?
BENEDICK
Sir, your wit ambles well; it goes easily.
PEDRO
I'll tell thee, how Beatrice prais'd thy wit the
other day: I said, thou hadst a fine wit; right, says
she, a fine little one; no, said I, a great wit; just,
said she, a great gross one; nay, said I, a good wit;
just, said she, it hurts no body; nay, said I, the gentleman is wife; certain, said she, a wife gentleman;
nay, said I, he hath the tongues that I believe, said
she, for he swore a thing to me on Monday night,
which he forswore on Tuesday morning; there's a
double tongue, there's two tongues. Thus did she
an hour together trans-shape thy particular virtues;
yet, at last, she concluded with a sigh, thou wast the
properest man in Italy.
CLAUDIO
For the which she wept heartily, and said,
she car'd not.
PEDRO
Yea, that she did; but yet for all that, and
if she did not hate him deadly, she would love him
dearly; the old man's daughter told us all.
CLAUDIO
All, all; and moreover, God saw him when
he was hid in the garden.
S
258
PEDRO
But when shall we set the savage bull's horns
on the sensible Benedick's head.
CLAUDIO
Yea, and text underneath, Here dwells Benedick the married man?
BENEDICK
Fare you well, boy, you know my mind; I
�will leave you now to your gossip-like humour; you
break jests as braggarts do their blades, which, God
be thank'd, hurt not. My lord, for your many courtesies I thank you; I must discontinue your company;
your brother, the bastard, is fled from Messina; you
have among you kill'd a sweet and innocent lady. For
my lord lack-beard there, he and I shall meet; and
'till then, peace be with him!
Exit Benedick.
PEDRO
He is in earnest.
CLAUDIO
In most profound earnest, and, I'll warrant
you, for the love of Beatrice.
PEDRO
And hath challeng'd thee?
CLAUDIO
Most sincerely.
PEDRO
What a pretty thing man is, when he goes
in his doublet and hose, and leaves off his wit!
SCENE IV.
Enter Dogberry, Verges, Conrade and Borachio
guarded.
CLAUDIO
He is then a giant to an ape; but then is
an ape a doctor to such a man.
PEDRO
But, soft you, let me see, pluck up my
heart and be sad; did he not say my brother was fled?
DOGBERRY
Come, you, Sir; if justice cannot tame you.
259
She shall ne'er weigh more reasons in her balance; nay,
an you be a cursing hypocrite once, you must be look'd
to.
PEDRO
�How now, two of my brother's men bound?
Borachio, one?
CLAUDIO
Hearken after their offence, my lord.
PEDRO
Officers, what offence have these men done?
DOGBERRY
Marry, Sir, they have committed false report; moreover, they have spoken untruths; secondarily, they are slanders sixth and lastly, they have
bely'd a lady; thirdly, they have verify'd unjust
things; and, to conclude, they are lying knaves.
PEDRO
First, I ask thee what they have done; thirdly, I ask thee what's their offence; sixth and lastly,
why they are committed; and, to conclude, what you
lay to their charge?
CLAUDIO
Rightly reason'd, and in his own division;
and by my troth, there's one meaning well suited.
PEDRO
Whom have you offended, masters, that you
are thus bound to your answer? This learned constable is too cunning to be understood. What's your
offence?
BORACHIO
Sweet Prince, let me go no further to mine
answer: do you hear me, and let this Count kill me:
I have deceiv'd even your very eyes; what your wisdoms could not discover, these shallow fools have
brought to light, who in the night overheard me confessing to this man, how Don John your brother incens'd me to slander the lady Hero; how you were
brought into the orchard, and saw me court Margaret
in Hero's garments; how you disgrac'd her, when
you should marry her; my villany they have upon record, which I had rather seal with my death, than
repeat over to my shame; the lady is dead upon mine
S2
260
�and my master's false accusation and briefly, I desire nothing but the reward of a villain.
PEDRO
Runs not this speech like iron through your
blood?
CLAUDIO
I have drunk poison, while he utter'd it.
PEDRO
But did my brother set thee on to this?
BORACHIO
Yea, and paid me richly for the practice of it.
PEDRO
He is compos'd and fram'd of treachery;
And fled he is upon this villany.
CLAUDIO
Sweet Hero! now thy image doth appear
In the rare semblance that I lov'd it first.
DOGBERRY
Come, bring away the plaintiffs; by this
time, our Sexton hath reform'd Signior Leonato of the
matter; and, masters, do not forget to specify, when
time and place shall serve, that I am an ass.
VERGES
Here, here comes master Signior Leonato, and
the Sexton too.
SCENE V.
Enter Leonato and Sexton.
LEONATO
Which is the villain? let me see his eyes;
That when I note another man like him,
I may avoid him; which of these is he?
BORACHIO
If you would know your wronger, look on
me.
LEONATO
Art thou, art thou the slave, that with thy
�breath
Hast kill'd mine innocent child?
BORACHIO
Yea, even I alone.
LEONATO
No, not so, villain; thou bely'st thyself;
Here stand a pair of honourable men,
A third is fled, that had a hand in it:
I thank you, Princes, for my daughter's death;
Record it with your high and worthy deeds;
'Twas bravely done, if you bethink you of it.
CLAUDIO
I know not how to pray your patience,
261
Yet I must speak: chuse your revenge yourself;
Impose me to what penance your invention
Can lay upon my sin; yet sinn'd I not.
But in mistaking.
PEDRO
By my soul, nor I;
And yet, to satisfy this good old man,
I would bend under any heavy weight,
That he'll enjoin me to.
LEONATO
You cannot bid my daughter live again,
That were impossible but, I pray you both,
Possess the People in Messina here
How innocent she dy'd; and if your love
Can labour aught in sad invention,
Hang her an Epitaph upon her tomb,
And sing it to her bones: Sing it to-night;
To-morrow morning come you to my house,
And since you could not be my son-in-law,
Be yet my nephew; my brother hath a daughter,
Almost the copy of my child that's dead.
And she alone is heir to both of us;
Give her the Right you should have given her Cousin,
And so dies my revenge.
CLAUDIO
O noble Sir!
Your over-kindness doth wring tears from me:
�I do embrace your offer: and dispose
for henceforth of poor Claudio.
LEONATO
To-morrow then I will expect your Coming,
To-night I take my leave. This naughty man
Shall face to face be brought to Margaret,
Who, I believe, was pack'd in all this wrong,
Hir'd to it by your brother.
BORACHIO
No. by my soul she was not;
Nor knew not What she did, when she spoke to me.
But always hath been just and virtuous,
In any thing that I do know by her.
DOGBERRY
Moreover, Sir, which indeed is not under
white and black, this plaintiff here, the offender, did
call me ass: I beseech you, let it be remembred in his
S3
262
punishment; and also the watch heard them talk of
one Deformed: they say, he wears a key in his ear,
and a lock hanging by it; and borrows money in God's
name, the which he hath us'd so long, and never paid,
that now men grow hard-hearted, and will lend nothing for God's sake. Pray you, examine him upon
that point.
LEONATO
I thank thee for thy care and honest pains.
DOGBERRY
Your Worship speaks like a most thankful
and reverend youth; and I praise God for you.
LEONATO
There's for thy pains.
DOGBERRY
God save the foundation?
LEONATO
Go, I discharge thee of thy prisoner; and I
thank thee.
�DOGBERRY
I leave an errant knave with your Worship,
which, I beseech your Worship to correct yourself,
for the example of others. God keep your Worship;
I wish your Worship well: God restore you to health;
I humbly give you leave to depart; and if a merry
meeting may be wish'd, God prohibit it. Come,
neighbour. [Exeunt.
LEONATO
Until to-morrow morning, Lords, farewel.
ANTONIO
Farewel, my Lords; we look for you tomorrow.
263
PEDRO
We will not fail.
CLAUDIO
To- night I'll mourn with Hero.
LEONATO
Bring you these fellows on, we'll talk with
Margaret,
How her acquaintance grew with this lewd fellow.
[Exeunt severally.
SCENE VI.
Changes to Leonato's House.
Enter Benedick, and Margaret.
BENEDICK
Pray thee, sweet Mistress Margaret, deserve well at my hands, by helping me to
the speech of Beatrice.
MARGARET
Will you then write me a sonnet in praise of
my beauty?
BENEDICK
In so high a style, Margaret, that no man
�living shall come over it; for, in most comely truth,
thou deservest it.
MARGARET
To have no Man come over me? why,
shall I always keep below stairs?
BENEDICK
Thy wit is as quick as the greyhound's mouth,
it catches.
MARGARET
And yours as blunt as the fencer's foils,
which hit, but hurt not.
BENEDICK
A most manly wit, Margaret, it will not hurt
264
a woman; and so, I pray thee, call Beatrice; I give
thee the bucklers.
MARGARET
Give us the swords; we have bucklers of
our own.
BENEDICK
If you use them, Margaret, you must put in
the pikes with a vice, and they are dangerous weapons
for maids.
MARGARET
Well, I will call Beatrice to you, who, I
think, hath legs. [Exit Margaret.
BENEDICK
And therefore will come. [Sings.] The God
of love, that fits above, and knows me, and knows me,
how pitiful I deserve, ----- I mean, in singing but
in loving, Leander the good swimmer, Troilus the first
employer of pandars, and a whole book full of these
quondam carpet-mongers, whose names yet run smoothly in the even road of a blank verse; why, they were
never so truly turn'd over and over, as my poor self,
in love; marry, I cannot shew it in rhime; I have
try'd; I can find out no rhime to lady but baby, an
innocent's rhime; for 'scorn, born, a hard rhime; for
school, fool, a babling rhime; very ominous endings;
�no, I was not born under a rhiming planet, for I cannot woo in festival terms.
SCENE. VII.
Enter Beatrice.
Sweet Beatrice, would'st thou come when I call thee?
BEATRICE
Yea, Signior, and depart when thou bid me.
BENEDICK
O, stay but 'till then.
BEATRICE
Then, is spoken; fare yau well now; and yet
ere I go, let me go with that I came for, which is,
265
with knowing what hath past between you and Claudio.
BENEDICK
Only foul words, and thereupon I will kiss
thee.
BEATRICE
Foul words are but foul wind, and foul wind
is but foul breath, and soul breath is noisome; therefore I will depart unkist.
BENEDICK
Thou hast frighted the word out of its right
sense, so forcible is thy wit; but, I must tell thee
plainly, Claudio undergoes my challenge; and either
I must shortly hear from him, or I will subscribe him
a coward; and I pray thee, now tell me, for which
of my bad parts didst thou first fall in love with me?
BEATRICE
For them all together; which maintain'd so
politick a state of evil, that they will not admit any
good part to intermingle with them: but for which
of my good parts did you first suffer love for me?
BENEDICK
Suffer love! a good epithet; I do suffer love,
indeed, for I love thee against my will.
�BEATRICE
In spight of your heart, I think; alas! poor
heart, if you spight it for my sake, I will spight it for
yours; for I will never love that, which my friend
hates.
BENEDICK
Thou and I are too wife to woo peaceably.
BEATRICE
It appears not in this confession; there's not
one wife man among twenty that will praise himself.
BENEDICK
An old, an old instance, Beatrice, that liv'd
5 in the time of good neighbours; if a man do not
erect in this age his own tomb ere he dies, he shall live
no longer in monuments, than the bells ring, and the
widow weeps.
BEATRICE
And how long is that, think you?
BENEDICK
Question? - why, an hour in clamour, and
266
a quarter in rhewm; therefore it is most expedient for
the wife, if Don worm (his conscience) find no impediment to the contrary, to be the trumpet of his own
virtues, as I am to myself; so much for praising myself; who, I myself will bear witness, is praise-worthy; and now tell me, how doth your Cousin?
BEATRICE
Very ill.
BENEDICK
And how do you?
BEATRICE
Very ill too.
BENEDICK
Serve God, love me, and mend; there will I
leave you too, for here comes one in haste.
�Enter Ursula.
URSULA
Madam, you must come to your uncle; yonder's old coil at home; it is proved, my lady Hero
hath been falsely accus'd; the Prince and Claudio mightily abus'd; and Don John is the author of all, who
is fled and gone: will you come presently?
BEATRICE
Will you go hear this news, Signior;
BENEDICK
I will live in thy eyes, die in thy lap, and be
bury'd in thy heart; and moreover I will go with thee
to thy uncle. [Exeunt.
SCENE VIII.
Changes to a Church.
Enter Don Pedro, Claudio, and Attendants with
Tapers.
CLAUDIO
Is this the monument of Leonato?
ATTENDENT
It is, my lord.
267
EPITAPH
Done to death by slanderous tongues
Was the Hero, that here lies:
Death, in guerdon of her wrongs,
Gives her fame which never dies.
So the life, that dy'd with shame,
Lives in death with glorious fame.
Hang thou there upon the tomb,
Praising her when I am dumb.
CLAUDIO
Now musick sound, and sing your solemn
hymn.
SONG
Pardon, Goddess of the night,
�Those that slew thy virgin knight;
for the which, with songs of woe,
Round about her tomb they go.
Midnight assist our moan;
Help us to sigh and groan
Heavily, heavily;
Graves, yawn and yield your dead,
'Till death be uttered,
Heavily, heavily.
CLAUDIO
Now unto thy bones good night!
Yearly will ! do this Rite.
PEDRO
Good morrow, masters, put your torches out;
The wolves have prey'd; and, look, the gentle
day,
Before the wheels of Phaebus, round about
Dapples the drowsy east with spots of grey:
268
Thanks to you all, and leave us; fare you well.
CLAUDIO
Good morrow, masters; each his several
way.
PEDRO
Come, let us hence, and put on other weeds;
And then to Leonato's we will go.
CLAUDIO
And Hymen now with luckier issue speed's8,
Than this, for whom we render'd up this woe!
[Exeunt.
SCENE IX.
Changes to Leonato's House.
Enter Leonato, Benedick, Margaret, Ursula, Antonio,
Friar, and Hero.
FRIAR
Did I not tell you, she was innocent?
LEONATO
�So are the Prince and Claudio, who
accus'd her.
Upon the error that you heard debated.
But Margaret was in some fault for this;
although against her will, as it appears,
In the true course of all the question.
ANTONIO
Well; I am glad, that all things sort so well.
BENEDICK
And so am I, being else by faith enforc'd
To call young Claudio to a reckoning for it.
LEONATO
Well, Daughter, and you gentlewomen all,
Withdraw into a chamber by yourselves.
And when I send for you, come hither mask'd:
The Prince and Claudio promis'd by this hour
To visit me; you know your office, brother,
269
You must be father to your brother's daughter,
And give yer to young Claudio. [Exeunt Ladies.
ANTONIO
Which I will do with confirm'd countenance.
BENEDICK
Friar, I must in treat your pains, I think.
FRIAR
To do what, Signior?
BENEDICK
To bind me, or undo me, one of them:
Signior Leonato, truth it is, good Signior,
Your niece regards me with me an eye of favour.
LEONATO
That eye my daughter lent her, 'tis most
true.
BENEDICK
And I do with an eye of love requite her.
LEONATO
The sight whereof, I think, you had from me.
�From Claudio and the Prince; but what's your will?
BENEDICK
Your answer, Sir, is enigmatical;
But for my will, my will is, your good will
May stand with ours, this day to be conjoin'd
I th' state of honourable marriage;
In which, good Friar, I snail desire your help.
LEONATO
My heart is with your liking.
FRIAR
And my help.
SCENE X.
Enter Don Pedro and Claudio, with Attendants.
PEDRO
Good morrow to this fair assembly.
LEONATO
Good morrow. Prince; good morrow, Claudio;
We here attend you; are you yet determin'd
To day to marry with my brother's daughter?
CLAUDIO
I'll hold my mind, were she an Ethiope.
LEONATO
Call her forth, brother, here's the Friar
ready. [Exit Antonio.
PEDRO
Good morrow, Benedick; why, what's the
matter,
That you have such a February face,
So full of frost, of storm and cloudiness?
CLAUDIO
I think, he thinks upon the savage bull:
Tush, fear not, man, we'll tip thy horns with gold,
270
And so all Europe shall rejoice at thee;
As once Europa did at lusty Jove,
When he would play the noble beast in love.
�BENEDICK
Bull Jove, Sir, had an amiable low,
And some such strange bull leapt your father's cow;
And got a calf, in that same noble feat,
Much like to you; for you have just his bleat.
SCENE XI.
Enter Antonio, with Hero, Beatrice, Margaret, and
Ursula, mask'd.
CLAUDIO
For this I owe you; here come other reck'nings.
Which is the lady I must seize upon?
ANTONIO
This same is she, and I do give you her.
CLAUDIO
Why, then she's mine; Sweet, let me see
your face.
LEONATO
No, that you shall not, 'till you take her
hand
Before this Friar, and swear to marry her.
CLAUDIO
Give me your hand; before this holy Friar,
I am your husband, if you like of me.
HERO
And when I liv'd, I was your other wife.
[Unmasking.
And when you lov'd, you were my other husband.
CLAUDIO
Another Hero?
HERO
Nothing certainer.
One Hero dy'd defil'd, but I do live;
And, surely, as I live, I am a maid.
PEDRO
The former Hero! Hero, that is dead!
�LEONATO
She dy'd, my lord, but whiles her slander
liv'd.
FRIAR
All this amazement can I qualify.
When, after that the holy rites are ended,
I'll tell thee largely of fair Hero's death:
Mean time let wonder seem familiar.
And to the chapel let us presently.
271
BENEDICK
Soft and fair, Friar. Which is Beatrice?
BEATRICE
I answer to that name; what is your will?
BENEDICK
Do not you love me?
BEATRICE
Why, no, no more than reason.
BENEDICK
Why, then your Uncle, and the Prince, and
Claudio, have been deceiv'd; they swore, you did.
BEATRICE
Do not you love me?
BENEDICK
Troth, no, no more than reason.
BEATRICE
Why, then my Cousin, Margaret and Ursula,
Have been deceiv'd; for they did swear you did.
BENEDICK
They swore you were almost sick for me.
BEATRICE
They swore, you were well-nigh dead for me.
BENEDICK
'Tis no matter; then you do not love me?
BEATRICE
�No, truly, but in friendly recompence.
LEONATO
Come, Cousin, I am sure, you love the gentleman.
CLAUDIO
And I'll be sworn upon't, that he loves her;
For here's a paper written in his hand,
A halting sonnet of his own pure brain,
Fashion'd to Beatrice.
HERO
And here's another.
Writ in my Cousin's hand, stolen from her pocket,
Containing her affection unto Benedick.
BENEDICK
A miracle! here's our own hands against our
hearts; come, I will have thee; but, by this light, I
take thee for pity.
BEATRICE
I would not deny you; but, by this good
272
day, I yield upon great persuasion, and partly to
save your life; for, as I was told, you were in a consumption.
BENEDICK
Peace, I will stop your mouth -----[Kissing her.
PEDRO
How dost thou, Benedick, the married man?
BENEDICK
I'll tell thee what, Prince; a College of witcrackers cannot flout me out of my humour: dost
think, I care for a satire, or an epigram? no: if a
man will be beaten with brains, he shall wear nothing
handsome about him; in brief, since I do purpose to
marry, I will think nothing to any purpose that the
world can say against it; and therefore never flout at
me, for what I have said against it for man is a giddy thing, and this is my conclusion; for thy part,
Claudio, I did think to have beaten thee; but in than
�thou art like to be my kinsman, live unbruis'd, and
love my cousin.
CLAUDIO
I had well hoped, thou would'st have denied
Beatrice, that I might have cudgelled thee out of thy
single life, to make thee a double dealer; which, out
of question, thou wilt be, if my Cousin do not look
exceeding narrowly to thee.
BENEDICK
Come, come, we are friends; let's have a
Dance ere we are marry'd, that we may lighten our
our own hearts, and our wives heels.
LEONATO
We'll have dancing afterwards.
BENEDICK
First, o'my word; therefore, play, musick.
273
Prince, thou art sad, get thee a wife, get thee a wife;
there is no staff more reverend than one tipt with horn.
Enter Messenger.
MESSENGER
My Lord, your brother John is ta'en in flight.
And brought with armed men back to Messina.
BENEDICK
Think not on him 'till to-morrow: I'll devise
thee brave punishments for him. Strike up, Pipers,
[Dance.
[Exeunt omnes. K
�
Dublin Core
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Title
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<em>Sok hűhó semmiért</em>
Subject
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A<em> Sok hűhó semmiért</em> című dráma verziói
Description
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A <em>Sok hűhó semmiért</em> című dráma angol és magyar szövegváltozatai, színházi és filmes adaptációi
Creator
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Almási Zsolt
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Digitalizált könyvek, színházi előadások, filmek
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Almási Zsolt
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magyar és angol
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Könyv
Dublin Core
The Dublin Core metadata element set is common to all Omeka records, including items, files, and collections. For more information see, http://dublincore.org/documents/dces/.
Title
A name given to the resource
Much Ado About Nothing (Johnson, 1765)
Subject
The topic of the resource
18. századi szövegváltozat, szerkesztője Samuel Johnson.
Description
An account of the resource
18. századi digitális, gondozott betűhív átirat. Az Internet Archive-ban található szövegváltozat gondozott átirata Johnson jegyzetei nélkül.
Creator
An entity primarily responsible for making the resource
William Shakespeare
Source
A related resource from which the described resource is derived
https://archive.org/details/playsofwilliamsh03shak_1
Publisher
An entity responsible for making the resource available
Internet Archive
Date
A point or period of time associated with an event in the lifecycle of the resource
1765
Contributor
An entity responsible for making contributions to the resource
Lewis Theobald (szerkesztő)
Gyurka Noémi (digitális átirat)
Farkas Orsolya (digitális átirat)
Almási Zsolt (digitális szerkesztés)
Rights
Information about rights held in and over the resource
Ez a Mű a Creative Commons Nevezd meg! - Ne add el! 4.0 Nemzetközi Licenc feltételeinek megfelelően felhasználható.
Format
The file format, physical medium, or dimensions of the resource
Könyv
PDF
Language
A language of the resource
angol
Type
The nature or genre of the resource
Komédia
License
A legal document giving official permission to do something with the resource.
Ez a Mű a Creative Commons Nevezd meg! - Ne add el! 4.0 Nemzetközi Licenc feltételeinek megfelelően felhasználható.
Medium
The material or physical carrier of the resource.
Digitális szöveg
Bibliographic Citation
A bibliographic reference for the resource. Recommended practice is to include sufficient bibliographic detail to identify the resource as unambiguously as possible.
The plays of William Shakespeare : in eight volumes : with the corrections and illustrations of various commentators, ed. Samuel Johnson, London : Printed for J. and R. Tonson; H. Woodfall; J. Rivington; R. Baldwin; L. Hawes, Clark and Collins; T. Longman; W. Johnston; T. Caslon; C. Corbet; T. Lownds; and the Executors of B. Dodd, London (1765) Vol. III 171-273.o.
Zotero
Author
William Shakespeare
Editor
Samuel Johnson
Artwork Medium
Digitális könyv
Book Title
Much Ado About Nothing
Date
1765.
First Page
171
Language
angol
Medium
Könyv
Num Pages
102
Number of Volumes
8
Pages
171-273.
Place
London
Publisher
J. and R. Tonson
H. Woodfall
J. Rivington
R. Baldwin
L. Hawes
Clark and Collins
T. Longman
W. Johnston
T. Caslon
C. Corbet
T. Lownds
Executors of B. Dodd
Rights
Ez a Mű a Creative Commons Nevezd meg! - Ne add el! 4.0 Nemzetközi Licenc feltételeinek megfelelően felhasználható.
URL
https://archive.org/details/playsofwilliamsh03shak_1
Volume
3
Digitális betűhív átirat
komédia
Much Ado About Nothing
Samuel Johnson
William Shakespeare